And how can you take responsibility and not let the hurt- hurt you? Owning your own feelings and setting boundaries supports yourself for a safe place and teaching others how they can treat you.
Danielle: Hurt people hurt people, but hurt people let them hurt you. How do we stop that happening? Danielle: Set up boundaries and also see. And you can switch it, and you can be more of love versus the hurt.
Hello, everyone. Danielle here, talking about the topic of this common phrase I've heard for a while now, like, probably over ten years. I read a book called winning with people. And there's a phrase, there's a whole chapter about hurting people hurt people. The second part of that is hurting people let them hurt you. So, yes, it's true, I believe. Hurt people hurt people, but hurt people let them hurt you. So, like, how do we stop that happening? Right? That's a good phrase. Sticks and stones may break my bones.
We don't have to let it happen. Right? And it's really powerful that you teach people how to treat you. You are teaching people how to treat you. So it's really powerful to set up boundaries and also see. Speak up. Like, I'm not gonna be part of this, or this is not what I want to do today. Like, this is not gonna be part of my conversation. This isn't gonna be part of what I wanna bring to the table is this type of dynamic. I call it, like, the drama triangle, right? There's the victim, the persecutor, and the abuser, and then the flip.
That is the coach, the challenger, and the creator. So are we noticing? Are we in one or the other? And you can switch it, and you can be more of love versus the hurt. And it takes time. And a lot of times, we can get addicted to those triangles or to that hurt. You can get stuck in it. You can get addicted to it. So it takes some time to not be a part of it, not allow it to happen to you. Set up boundaries, put yourself in a safe place, say, no, I will not be a part of this. Like, flat out no. And you'll start, once you start practicing getting out of it, you won't let it happen again, and you almost won't.
You'll won't be in spaces where that can happen, or you'll just, like, repel those situations, or you'll just jump out of that situation when it starts to arise. So, yes, I believe hurt people hurt people, but hurting people let them hurt you, like, you take it on versus creating almost like this, an invisible force around you. Do not let that happen. So questions on this, know that, yes, it does happen, and you can have your own superpowers around you to not let it impact you. Questions? My name is Danielle.
Let me know. The book is by Jonathan C. Maxwell. With winning with people. It's a really good one. There's a whole chapter about this topic. Have a good day.
