Live w/ Dr.Charryse

What's up, Cadre? So good to be back. First time with me. I'm Doctor Charryse Johnson, a licensed clinical mental health therapist, mindfulness practitioner and author, and my goal is to help you experience peace and harmony in every area of your life if you're willing to do the work. Several, probably months ago, maybe weeks, I did some content around personality types and specifically walked you all the way through type a and type b, but also mentioned that those aren't the only personality types, even though those are the ones that kind of get the most attention.

So I want to follow back up and share with those of you who are interested. Thank you for the reminder about type c, c and type d. These two personality types are two of the most unique and often overlooked personality types you'll find as we talk about different personality types. And if you go back and listen to some of the prior information that I gave you, that there can definitely be overlap. Is it crucial for you to know exactly which temperament type you are? Not crucial, but it is helpful.

So think about that as you reflect back on your notes. If you took them from last time or as we get into things this morning or whenever you're listening to. It might not be morning, but for those who are here and live and in living color, it's so great to see you. I put something out there real fast. I will. I don't think this will take as long as some of the others, but I still want to make sure I give you everything. And as always, if you have questions, you can go ahead and put them in the chat as I talk, and then I'll do my best to try to bring them into the equation.

So what's up? What's up? Yes, we're live. Good to see you, Beth and Marcie and all the other names. If I don't say your name, it's because it's not under your name. Hello, Nikki. But I see you. I recognize you and I love you and I'm glad that you are here. So, personality type c. This type, or temperament is often known as the anti rule breaker. So someone who has this dominant temperament tends to run towards perfectionism. Now, let me jump here and say type a's are often rooted around perfectionism.

Theirs is a little bit different. And you'll understand more as I talk about what type C looks like. Type a, perfectionism is very overbearing. There is only one way and they make sure everyone knows it. Or you feel stressed when you feel like you can't live up to their expectations because they always make them known. That's why type a gets a bad rap. That's why they're high strung. That's why they often get a lot more attention as a personality type. But here's the thing about a type c. A type c is a perfectionist in the sense of they will put their head down, not say much, but they will spend hours upon hours of time focused on trying to get something right.

So there's this quiet level of perfectionism in them that can be displayed as a strong. And although that is a strength, it can also be a struggle. So, question. Yeah? Would type a's be OCD? Type people? So any temperament can have OCD. Type a's aren't necessarily OCD, because OCD in of itself means they struggle to function if things aren't a certain way, if they can't go towards a particular ritual. So it's really very different. And dominant type a's, when people are loosely and using OCD in the wrong way, will feel like they're compulsive or overbearing or obsessive about things.

They do want things a certain way, but at the end of the day, a type a who does not have OCD, they can survive when things aren't their way. They just don't want to. Someone with OCD would literally struggle to get through a moment or a situation or an experience if they could not do it in a particular order. So, unfortunately, in the world of using lingo out of context, we've really reduced OCD to something that is a lot less clinical than what it actually is. So a lot of type a's are not necessarily OCD, but they could be, as could a type B, a type C, or a type D.

So, again, that type C's have that quiet perfectionism, their temperament, who could be OCD, and it would be completely overlooked because they're not going to tell anyone. They're not going to make it known that things need to be a certain way. So, positive traits, because we all have them of a type C, they're thoughtful, they're dependable, they're patient, and they're kind. That's the difference between a type C and a type A. Perfectionism is type C is going to be patient, but as a result of that, they also internalize when something isn't the right way.

They avoid negative emotions. So we know a lot of type C individuals often will try to present as if everything is going really well, even when that may not be how they feel, and they have a difficult time coping with their problems, so they're not going to let you know. When they're struggling, they often want to present a certain way and feel like they have to do things by the book. They don't want to break rules. The thought of breaking rules makes them nervous. They want to be viewed as someone who did it the right way and buy the book.

But at the same time, when they feel like they haven't been able to do that, they can't. Audrey. Pastor Audrey, go preach it up. You know, I know I was like, all the people who know I'm on here on Sunday gonna be like, are you not in church? But I'm getting over being sick. So I didn't want to infect the people. But I can't wait to watch you later. I hope you have a good sermon. And for all of you who either are in church, hopefully not right now, headed to church or whatever, later, I hope you enjoy that.

The other thing that is important to know about a type C temperament, the last thing that I'll say about this temperament personality type is they're prone to both stress and depression. And the challenge to the type C temperament is, again, because they're so thoughtful and because they're so kind and because they're so meticulous about how they do things. You may have a very difficult time seeing their stress and their depression. You see hints of it, but they will constantly reassure you that they're okay and not to worry about them.

But something in you, if you have someone like this in your life, will kind of have a feeling or a sense potentially that they're not okay. They're a classic example of check on your strong friends. Right. We know when a type a isn't well because they let everybody know, and it shows up because of how they're acting, because things are out of their control. A type c can fly under the radar. So I really want you to think about, is this you that I'm talking about? Is this your partner or spouse? Is this one of your children that always does very well, perhaps even a middle child who doesn't really rock the boat.

And you have a tendency not to check on them because there aren't any large, big, bright outward signs that they're not okay. I want to put this in as a reminder. We can never truly look at someone and know how they're doing. It's very important for us to stay connected to their heart, to pay attention and notice how much time are they spending on this area? Have they done enough? Are they staying up really late. m. To do something? And you go, oh, my goodness, they have such amazing work ethic.

That's not amazing work ethic. That is a desire for quiet perfectionism and for achieving, at a certain level, anything I get through without coughing, but it can really hurt them on the other end. Now, let's look at type d before everything starts coming back up and giving out. So the d in type d stands for distressed. The type d personality is going to have a tendency to experience negative emotions. So when you are displaying this temperament type, or if you feel like this is something that's resonating with you or someone that you love, this is a person that is constantly going to see the glass half empty and be pessimistic.

They almost seem like they befriend negative emotions. And what I mean by that is they're overly comfortable with negative emotions and almost give excuse for this is just how I am. I can't help how I feel. So there's an element of them that may feel very powerless to be able to change, but then as a result of that type D personality, everyone around them is really on eggshells. Or you're constantly making decisions. I want you to think about this. Is there anyone in your life, in your family or your work relationship, where you all know without saying it, that you're making decisions to keep this person from being distressed?

What time do we leave? Where do we go? When do we do it? How do we do it? You may even have a child who has this temperament, and you overcompensate and kind of enable that temperament because you're working so hard to try to help them to experience some kind of joy, even though they're constantly gloomy or irritable, they're also going to be more closed off to social interactions. Or if they do interact, it's going to be with a small, select group of individuals that, unfortunately, may be as negative and gloomy and pessimistic as them.

And so this temperament pattern is very real and very challenging to live with. Very challenging. It can, of course, present any gender or binary, so that has nothing to do with it. We also know that type D temperaments, sorry, I'm gonna cough again. Are prone to chronic forms of psychological distress. So they may be prone to the depression and to the anxiety as well. Their anxiety is often going to come off as anger or irritability. And the thing about a type D, in the rare brief moments that they are up on their baseline and cordial.

It is everything, and they're so wonderful and endearing. But there's also a part of you that knows it could turn just as fast as it started, and that that part of them is often inconsistent. The challenge to living yourself or with someone that has that type D temperament is if you think about this in terms of, like, family or relationships or even work, a type D temperament often creates a lot of anxiety, even for other people who wouldn't typically be anxious. But they don't know how to manage the low that is found in that type D personality.

Then if you add a type D personality type that drinks or uses substances to help manage or cope with what they won't cope with in a healthy way, then that adds another layer of their emotions being off. We do often see that individuals that have a type D personality may struggle with alcohol addiction or substance addiction. Again, that does not mean that other personality types can't. But often type D temperaments are very resistant to supporting themselves in healthy ways. So they, again, would prefer to self medicate, whether that's through food, another substance, or through alcohol, which, again, brings them up that much and then drops them even lower.

So what do you do if you feel like, is this me, or is this someone that you know or someone that you work with? First, remember that what I'm giving you is a very small picture of each of these temperament types. If I've said something that really sparks in you, there might be more to this. I am always a proponent of you being able to work with someone who is a licensed professional so that you can go in and say, I think this is me. I want to talk through how I can work on this, or I live with someone, love someone, or work with someone who I'm now recognizing has a certain temperament, and as a result of their temperament, it becomes a trigger or an activator for your own temperament.

So know when it's time for you to work with someone on how to navigate and cope with the presence of this in your life. The other thing that I want you to consider is, where are there people in your life that are in these temperaments and you're too connected to them, meaning they're friends that you've known all your life. Just using that as an example, and I'm not necessarily saying, oh, get rid of them, but it's important for you to recognize that your mental fitness, your mental health, is going to be connected to the people that are in your life.

So if you are working on yourself and growing and being full of peace and harmony, but surrounded by really difficult temperament types, that's going to be a struggle. So at the least, put some boundaries in place around how much time you spend around them. But more than anything, what I want you to know as well is that you cannot fix someone else's temperament. I almost want you to raise your hand and say that I cannot fix or change someone else's temperament. I'm going to get into speaking about love and connections and relationships during the month of February, and this will be one of the pieces that I hone in on.

So I'll use it as a little segue. You can't change how someone is wired. They have to have a desire and a motivation for themselves and recognizing that there's nothing wrong with how they feel. But it's helpful for them to be willing to do something, to go. But I need to hold myself responsible for how I'm responding to how I feel. Maybe making other people feel so, that's what's key. You have to let go and focus on yourself. We can show different parts of any temperament, but we all have a dominant temperament, and that's what makes it so challenging.

The dominant temperament is going to be the one that rises to the surface when we're stressed and when we're overwhelmed, because we're going to fall back to our natural nature when we feel good. It's very easy to present as a different temperament. But in those low, difficult, stressful moments, that's when you're going to see an individual's true core temperament rise to the occasion. And it's important to know, I love them, but this is their work. And your work is on repairing and healing the part of you that feels it is your fault, it is your responsibility, and it is up to you to balance out their temperament.

It is not. Even if you feel like there are things that happened in your life, your workplace, that may have impacted their temperament, it's still not totally your work. You acknowledge it. You work on yourself. You give them opportunity and tools that they can utilize in order to grow, but you also have to release yourself from their temperament. Okay, so you can again scroll back through under my profile if you want a refresher or on type a and type b. But I wanted to give you type c and type d.

And again, if nothing else, keep a few things in mind. One, it is important for you to have a level of non judgment and acceptance around your temperament, not others. Right? It is important for you not to accept every temperament and how it impacts you. But for yourself, we don't want to beat ourselves up. Non judgment means I recognize this is how I'm wired. And in order for me to want to do anything about it, it's going to be important for me not to judge myself or I'm just going to feel guilty and horrible and like I can't change and then I become the victim.

So non judgment, except this is how I'm wired, whether that's from nature, nurture, and of course a combination of the two. But it doesn't stop there. I don't judge myself. I accept that this is how I am. But as a result of accepting that this is how I am, I also have to accept that it is my responsibility to make sure that I manage this part of my temperament so that I don't hurt other people. Because our pain, even though it does put us in situations where we do things that we regret, does not give us an excuse for hurting other people.

We have a responsibility to heal. That's why you spend the time coming here. That's why I come to help you and other providers and creators do the same. Knowledge is not power without application. So we can't just have an understanding and a self awareness of who we are and then choose to ignore it and tell the world to deal with it. That's not healing, that's not love, and that is not okay if you are surrounded by a strong presence of type C and type D personalities in your life right now. Set yourself free, whether that is a child or a spouse or a boss.

I want you to give yourself permission to set yourself free and work on loving and accepting yourself and know that you've always been enough. You've always been wonderful and great. They don't have the capacity to acknowledge that, not because you're not wonderful and great, but because they're hurting and can't see beyond themselves. All right, thank you for hopping in and joining. How can you take this information and utilize it? Replay as necessary and as you feel led, share this with someone.

There are so many individuals who don't have access to this the way you do. They don't know that Cadre exists. They don't know that there's a place that they can come and for pennies on the dollar, get information that comes from a reliable source. So don't just use this for yourself. Share it with someone who might be in need. m. Have a good one.