Cadre Today: Family Ties

Hey there. Good morning, Cadre. It is a nice early edition of Cadre today. Today. How you doing? How are you doing on this morning? Or if you're watching at another time, how you doing then you know, I'm really glad I'm here. My name is JC if we've never shared time and space together before, thank you for the opportunity to spend some time with you right now. Hey, 1% better. And someone snuck in at right at the same time. I didn't see your name pop up on the screen, but say good morning. Good morning.

Hey, Luke, Nice to see you, my friend. I'm glad I'm here. I'm glad you're here. I know what I know because I've lived my life, which is very different than you live in your life. So we each know the things that we know. And I care about you even if I don't know you face to face, even if I don't see your name. Come on in. Hey, Beezy bits. Hey Mr. I care about you. The reason why I care about you is people do better when we realize that we're interdependent beings. Anybody who really thinks of themselves as self made, if they expand the aperture even just a little bit, you start to see the other people, the other people within that, within that sphere and within that space who are impacting you, who are creating pathways, who are creating resources, who are doing the things that innately link you together.

So whenever I say things like, hey, I'm glad I'm here, I'm glad you're here, I know what I know and I care about you. Hey Shannon, nice to see you too, my friend. That's the formula, that's the chemistry that creates the Cadre sphere. On Thursdays most often, you hear people talk about the people that they care for, the people that because of circumstance and reality, they may need to invest their time and energy, their vocation, their. Their focus on someone else's well being. I literally saw a stat this morning right before I signed on that said the average caregiver makes $23,000 a year.

So the thing that kind of clicked me there was not the dollar amount, but the fact that caregiving becomes a profession, a vocation, a job which doesn't take away the heart and the feel and the why, but it's another job. So quite often in the live stream space, in the Cadre currents, you see a lot of people talk about the active caregiving. And if that's something that interests you, I encourage you to go and hit the three Little lines up in the corner, maybe. Some people call that like a hamburger menu.

I like. Just think of it as the three lines, because if you don't know what it's called, you see three lines, click on it, and you can go ahead and find different communities, caregiving being one of them. And if that interests you, you can go ahead and click join, and then you'll see all the content that is being created in that space that will start to pop up for you. So with that being said, I was working with one of my voice students yesterday on. On a song that I love, but I haven't listened to in a long time.

And the song's called Nothing in Common. It's the song written by a composer about himself and about his relationship with his brother. And the first couple of verses go by where, you know, he talks about growing up and being his brother's brother and how different the two of them were and how they would fight and how they would get annoyed with each other. And the song goes on, and every verse is another chapter of life. And now he's grown up, and he has this lyric where he says, we have nothing much in common.

We are more or less the same. I love that lyric. We've got nothing much in common, but we're more or less the same. I spend a lot of my time as the young person in my family, watching my family's needs change over time. Mine too. But as the person who's kind of seen as the. The. The one who will take care of people. It's so interesting at the kind of the meeting place of our need and opportunity to care for others and our ability to be in varying degrees of likability with them. You may be the person who goes, I have to care about this person a lot.

I have to do a lot for them, and I really don't like them, and they really annoy me, and they're really different, or vice versa, or anywhere within that plot point, I want to go ahead and shout out loud that if you're in the caregiving space and you have to care for someone who you don't like that much, I'm not talking love. Right. We can love the heck out of people and absolutely dislike them. I would say that is kind of probably one of the most popular forms of a family relationship. We love them, we don't like them.

I think a lot of times there can be a lot of guilt or shame or isolation around having those thoughts, especially as someone moves in the direction of needing more and more care at various chapters of my of my year, there are times I'm working with in the same day, 10 to 18 year olds in one job and 62 to 90 year olds in another job. And I'll literally spend the morning with one group and the evening with with the other. And I'll look and I go, wow, you all have very differing need sets and there are some of you who can annoy the crap out of me.

And yet I remember now I'm not in a caregiving space in those roles, but I always place in my brain, it's like, okay, how much do I like you and how much do you need from me? The reason why I go through that processing is it normalizes the fact, as I said, that liking and loving, caring for and being annoyed by these are not isolated things. They're not things that if one moves in one direction, so does the other. So no matter where we are, no matter what's going on, I invite you to remember that your ability to care for is not innately connected to your ability to be liking the people that you're caring for.

A little tidbit for the day. If you're reading the chat, you'll go ahead and see 1% better reference. A loss for Luke. No worries if you're thinking it's a person, but big worries if you're a person who understands how people love their sports. The Timberwolves lost last night, so. So you can see 1% better and Luke going back and forth here. Yep, the Timberwolf season ended, but there's always another year. And pretty wonderful that we were the only team this year and the only team in a little bit who's been back to back Western Conference finals, which is pretty great.

So wherever you are, whatever's going on today, I hope it's a good one. And if it's not, that is okay too. Have a good one. Bye.