Deep Dive With Dr. Carrie

Hey, Cadre family. Good morning. Happy Wednesday. It's doctor carrie here. I did something a little bit crazy a couple of days ago, something that has actually been on my bucket list for almost five years. I did stand up comedy at an open mic night at a comedy club, and I'm going to share about my experience today because it was so fun, and it was just lots of life lessons in this moment. So I have been thinking about doing this, like I said, for almost five years, and it's been on my bucket list as just something I wanted to try.

Like, I'm not planning on becoming a comedian. I don't think this is, like, what I'm made for. I just wanted to try it because it looks fun, and I knew it would push me outside my comfort zone. So when COVID hit, all the clubs closed down because I was gonna do it that year, and so I never had a chance to do it. So now it's like, okay, it's coming around 2022. Things are opening up again. And then I just would chicken out and be like, I don't know. I don't know if I'm gonna do it now, but I finally put it on my list.

Like, I'm going to do this before a certain date. And let me tell you, when you're goal setting, that is key. You have to, like, make a deadline for yourself, because I am up to the wire. Like, my deadline's literally, like, five days from now. So I had, like, this week to get it done. Okay. So I did a lot of research into what comedy clubs do open mic in San Diego area, and I found one that does open mic seven nights a week, and they give you a time slot, three to five minutes. You find out how much time you actually have when you get there, but they will take you off the stage if you go over.

So, like, you really have to stay within your time limit. And I figured out the signup process, and I finally was like, okay, I'm gonna do it. So you sign up on Sundays, and then they tell you if you're confirmed. And I'm like, I'll choose Monday because there'll probably be less people there. And, yeah, that may not be as scary as, like, a Friday or Saturday or something. So I chose Monday. Was wrong about the not pee many people there. Oh, my gosh. The place was packed. But anyway, as I'm signing up, I am, like, clicking my name right on the list, and I couldn't do it.

I was, like, panicking. I was, like, having anxiety about just, like, signing up, just requesting to sign up, and I'm like, wow, this is really uncomfortable. Like, I don't get anxiety about things very often like this, but I'm obviously really nervous about this. So just kind of, like, checked in with my body of like, wow, I definitely have some fear around this. Okay. Okay. We're gonna just explore that for a minute. Doing my own little life coaching, right? And so I finally, like, hit submit, and then I had to do some self talk.

I had to say to myself, I speak in front of audiences all the time. Like, I travel to conferences, and I speak in front of hundreds of people. I don't know, why is this so scary? So I had to kind of, like, dialogue it with myself, and it came down to, this is something I've never done before, and I'm not an expert in it. When I speak at a conference, I'm an expert in that topic. It's very different. And I don't even know if I'm good. I don't even know if I'm funny. So I'm like, well, all right, we're gonna try it, though.

I still want to try it, even though I'm really nervous. So I kind of had, like, coach myself in the moment. So I get down to San Diego, which is quite a bit of a drive for me, really, really early, and again, I'm just like, I think I'm gonna wet my pants. Like, I'm not even at the place yet, and I'm so nervous, but I'm just, again, talking myself through this. So I'm sure my heart rate was, like, through the roof. And I finally park, and I go wait outside, and the door doesn't open. There's actually no door handles on the doors.

No joke. It's, like, kind of like those doors that, like, both open at the same time. And it's like the push one went from the inside, and there's no door handles. And I'm like, I'm not even be able to get in. I went through this whole process, and I'm not even in. The place doesn't even open. Turns out they just don't have door handles. But anyway, so I stood outside for quite a while before they opened, and meanwhile, I got to meet a couple of people that were also there for stand up comedy. And everybody there was there linked to do open mic night.

So I got to chatting with a couple of people, and this other guy, he decided that morning, I'm going to do stand up comedy today. And I was like, whoa, I've been thinking about it for five years. Dang, that's gutsy. Okay. And then the other guy had been doing this at a few clubs, so he kind of, like, had a little bit of experience. But then we get to meet some other people as we're sitting there talking, and then there's a couple and another couple, and they just come because it's free comedy, right, whether it's gonna be good or not.

So they're like, this is your first time. This is your first time? And I was like, yeah, I'm just doing this to check it off my bucket list, and then you'll never see me again. And they're like, oh, we're so excited for you for first time. And I just felt so esteemed in that moment of, like, they're gonna support me no matter what happens on stage. So I end up finally getting on stage, okay. Like, 2 hours after standing outside, it's late, and I am, again, super nervous. Super nervous. I'm praying, okay?

Like, God give me peace, calm my nerves, and I get up on stage. I kind of blacked out through the whole thing, to be honest, guys. Like, I know what I said, and I had rehearsed it for a couple of days. I basically told a funny story. I didn't do, like, one liners, and I then realized there's two different forms of comedy. There's, like, one liner comedy, and there's, like, storytelling. I'm, like, learning about the comedy world as I'm sitting there listening to people. But I had a three minute time slot, and I knew my story was, like, real tight on three minutes, so I said it really fast.

Didn't really leave a lot of time for people to laugh. I did hear some laughs, but I was just like, I don't care. I'm gonna get up there, I'm gonna do it, and I don't care if anybody laughs. And I'm just gonna be done and go sit back down. And as I'm sitting there listening to these other people, and, like, I was feeling more and more excited about it, also nervous because the atmosphere was just so, it's just so comforting. Like, there were people that, like, nobody laughed because their jokes were so bad.

I mean, they were bombing it, and they're up there, like, with the microphone. Like, I'm totally bombing this today. Anyway, thanks for letting me try this out, guys. And so I was like, if I get up there and get no laughs, it's no big deal. Nobody's booing me off the stage. And by the end of the night I had made two really nice friends, and I felt just so supported in this community of people because I did get some laughs. Maybe I am funny, or maybe they were just supporting me, just, like, pretending to laugh.

Because when my one friend got up there, my new friend I met that night, I laughed out loud just so he could, like, feel a little bit, you know, esteemed in that moment and honored, even though it was like, yeah, he's funny. But, like, I made a point to, like, laugh a little bit more. So I think just the culture there was also just so enriching for somebody to try something new. And I drove home reflecting on this, and I thought, gosh, why can't more rooms be like this? Like, why do we. Why do we go into meetings?

Why do we go into places doing things? And we're all so hard on each other. Like, everybody there was trying something new for that first time. Whether they'd been on the stage multiple times, they were trying new jokes out. A lot of them try out, like, a new joke they've never tried before, new material to see if it's funny. But all of us were in the learning phase, and I just thought, you know what? In life, everybody's in the learning phase, right? Nobody's got this figured out. Nobody's got their job description figured out.

Nobody's got parenting figured out. Nobody's got anything figured out. We're all just figuring it out as we go in life, and we're so hard on each other, and why can't we just be a little bit more like this room full of really awful, some of them are awful guys, comedians, and some of them are good and just laugh along with them and just give them that support that they need, because that's what made me walk out of there just beaming, smiling, even if I totally bombed it, that they were there to support me.

And, you know, when my friend got up there, like, we both high fived each other, when we sat back down, like, you did it, like, you just did it, and whether it was good or not, you still did it, right? You still tried something new, you still got outside your comfort zone. So I would just encourage you to think about the rooms that you go in on a regular basis. Is it an office room? Is it a meeting room? Is it a small group room? Is it a, you know, time with friends, whatever it may be, the rooms that you go into, how can you set that culture of just establishing, steaming each other and being there for each other and recognizing that none of us have it figured out in life because that's really what made all of us walk out of there with smiles on Monday night.

So again, thank you for tuning in with me on this live stream. And for those wondering, I am not going to share the video. I did video myself and I am the only one who has watched it, so stop asking because it's not getting shared. I did it just so I could have documentation that I did this and I will probably never do it again. But it was fun and I just hope you guys learned something from my story this morning. So thanks for tuning in. Thanks, Linda. And thanks, Olivia. Love you guys. God bless.