5 Steps to Stop Living in Survival Mode Pt. 2

Hi, Cadre friends. It's Shannon from allowed. We are sitting here in a beautiful day in St. Paul, Minnesota. I have my face strategically placed over the sun so that it's not in your eyes. And we're here today to normalize talking about taboo topics. That's why we exist. That's why aloud exists. I'm Shannon. I'm the founder of Aloud. I'm not a therapist. I'm not a mental health professional. I'm a human being who has lived through multiple, multiple traumas in my life, including CPTSD, which is complex post traumatic stress disorder, having an anxiety diagnosis, being the parent of a special needs child, and really, honestly, just shame that comes with trying to live up to the expectations that others put on me and the roles that come with being a member of society.

So I'm honestly, like many of you. So last time here at aloud, we talked about kicking off a series called how to stop living in survival mode, how to start living above zero. And so I shared with you last time what it was going to be about and what I'm going to share with you today are really five steps to stop living in survival mode. These steps are the culmination of my own personal experience going through what's called air network therapy. Feel free to google it. It's air network therapy. I have a beautiful therapist who I'm going to call Tracy.

You'll probably, you know, you'll probably come to know her through these videos. She's an amazing human. I actually have an impression of her that I will share later. But my recovery, if you're going to call it that, that's what I would call it, honestly, is a result of these five steps and these things that I did in my own experience in therapy. So I kicked off the first one last time. It was called knowing. I'll talk a teeny bit more about that right now. So the first step is knowing. The first step in starting to live out of survival mode and starting to be a whole human being again, is to know that something's wrong.

So how do you know that something's wrong? You feel it in your gut, right? You know it in your body. You will. It's frequently, for me, it was connected to roles that I take on and really putting an effort into trying to be the right way, to be the right version of that role. We'll talk more about this in a minute. But step one is knowing that something's going on, knowing that there's a misalignment of who you are and how you're showing up in the world. Step number two is a hard one. Step number two is say it out loud.

I'll get into this further in the future. Saying it out loud can be one of the most scary things you ever do, because once you say it, it's manifested in the world. I alluded to this in my last live, but my life blew up when I said my truth out loud. And my truth when I was married seven years ago was that I had feelings for someone else in my life. I was a married. I was a married person. We'd been married for ten years. We had a beautiful life, and I noticed that I was having feelings for another person.

I knew it was wrong and it was true, and I sat with that for a really long time. And when I said it out loud, it changed my entire life. So saying out. Saying it out loud can be a huge deal. And that's step number two. Step number three is noticing. So you say a truth out loud. Once you put it out into the world, you start to notice how it makes you feel, right? So if you live with that truth and you've said it out loud, even just to yourself, your paradigm will shift. And if you start to really play it through and really notice what it does in your body, in your life, and everywhere, you can start to do something with that information.

So that's step number three is notice. So step number one is to know. Step number two is to say it out loud. And step number three is to notice. Step number four is to see a world where x might exist. What that means is you now have this new truth. You've acknowledged it in the world. You're noticing how it's playing out in your life and how that's manifesting in your body and soul. And this is where it starts to turn into hope and a new kind of future where you can say, do I see a world where x can exist?

And I'll use some examples. One for me that I struggle with to this day is, do I see a world that exists, where I can be happy? And it's not selfish. That's a huge one for me. We'll dig into that one later. That's step number four. And step number five is what we're gonna all do for the rest of our lives, which is practice all the other steps. This is a part of this process that I inevitably come to with my beautiful friend Tracy, my air network therapist, when I have a new thing that I know to be true in my body, and I say it out loud.

And then I go, oh, God, you're gonna take. This is it. I'm practicing. I'm gonna have to do this whole thing all over again with each new thing. And she just smiles at me and says, yes, you are. And that's our lifelong endeavor, is to always practice. But if we practice these things, if we do these five steps, knowing, noticing that feeling in our body. Number two, saying it out loud, manifesting it as true in the world, which makes it truer for us. Number three, noticing how that truth and that thing you just said, it said out loud affects you and affects your life.

And then turning that corner on step four to say, all right, do I see a world where a new thing can exist? And then the beautiful step five, practice, practice, practice is practicing. That's what we're going to explore in this. In this journey. That's what we're going to explore in this series. I'm going to go through step by step with you. I will share my real life examples with you because our goal, hear it aloud, is for you to see others like you and to hear their stories. And then someday, I want you all to come tell me your story, too.

But it's normalizing things that we're all going through. So excited for this. So excited to go through all these steps. Thank you for being here one last time. Number one, no. Number two, say it out loud. Number three, notice number four, see a world where a new thing can exist. And number five, practice that new thing. More to come on, all of that. You're doing a great job being you. Thank you for joining me. More from allowed soon. You are loved, and I'm going to get this countdown so that I don't do this every time, but have a great day.

We'll talk to you soon. Bye.