Leading With Love 💕

Hey, cadres. Fear it is Anila. I'm in my closet, just finished bedtime, although my son is still awake, so I gotta go back soon to cuddle with him. I'm Anila. I am co founder of a company called Habit Aware, and we help people with trichotillomania, which is compulsory repulsive hair pulling. Hi, Janet. Welcome. I'm just getting settled into my closet to hang out with you and lead with love, and I'm reading Harry Potter and the chamber of Secrets to my son. This is the second book in the Harry Potter series.

My husband read the first chapter, the first book to him, and I get the honor of reading the second one. And I am coming to you in the Cadre sphere with lived experience with a variety of mental health conditions. And one of them is trichotillomania, which is the company, which is the problem that my company, Habitaware, solves for. It helps people with. I also have anxiety and premenstrual dysphoric disorder, dance with breast cancer in 2022 and just loads of other things. Welcome, Jules. Good evening to you.

So this session is called leading with love. It's a nice way to end out wellness Wednesday. Hi, Shannon. Good to see you. And sometimes I'm prepared to come on here with something, and sometimes I'm just inspired by whatever happens in the moment. And. And for me, the moment happened just a few minutes ago when I was reading Harry Potter and the chamber of Secrets to my seven year old. Again, this is the second book, year two. I haven't read the first one, so. But I've kind of seen enough to know, get the story, but I want to read a passage from here because it just kind of clicked for me, something about Harry and whether this really is about leading with love or just mental health in general, just go with me.

Okay, so let me find the passage. So this is, like, the very first chapter. I'm gonna assume that there's no spoilers here that people kind of know. Harry Potter's a magical kid, but he lives with his aunt and uncle, who are Muggles, which is the term for people who don't have magical abilities. In our world, we might call them quote unquote normal. And he's had one year at school and is now back with them for the summer and is just, like, super sad because he's locked up in this place where people treat him badly because of this thing, that he has these magical powers.

And he says to his cousin, his cousin asks him, pass the frying pan. And Harry says, you forgot the magic word, which obviously means, hey, you didn't say that nicely. Can you please say please? But he used the word magic and that freaked out the family. And the dad starts yelling, the uncle starts yelling. What have I told you about saying the m word? How dare you? I warned you. I will not tolerate mention of your abnormality under this roof. And so that line made me think, what if the story of Harry Potter is really about mental health?

If you trade, Harry Potter has magical abilities with Harry Potter has trichotillomania, the story is still the same. He's shunned by these normal Muggles for having that condition. And so I just thought it was really interesting to think of it that way. And then he even goes off to school where there's other kids like him and, you know, they're kind of like over there doing their thing. And that's kind of how the nineties was for us, where if you had a condition that put you out of what was considered normal, you would go to a quote unquote special school for that.

Right? So I just thought that was a very interesting way to look at Harry Potter. And now as I read this, I'm going to kind of look at it with that lens a little bit more of, is this a commentary on mental health? Could this be so, yeah, it's not really leading with love tonight. It's leading with curiosity, leading with, you know, trying to understand. But, yeah, I'd love to. If anyone's chat in the chat has read this series, there's seven plus books, I think. I don't know. I'd love to know what your thoughts on her are on this book series and the magic of Harry Potter to you.

But to me right now, this idea of magic as, you know, they use the word abnormality as something that is different from quote unquote normal people. Yes. Junk food junk. Junk food junk. I just, ah, your comment just whooshed away. But yes, similar to, I think you mentioned Asperger's and some couple other things. I don't know, the chat went away. But yeah, I mean, that's kind of where I'm thinking too. Like, I remember when I was a child, eighties, nineties, um, I used to go to a caregiver's house and I used to go to a caregiver's house and her daughter.

I would be waiting for my bus, which would take me to my regular, in quotes, daycare. And her daughter had down syndrome, and she would be waiting for her bus that would take her to her school. Right? So that idea of, like, you have something that makes you not like everyone else, and so we want you over here, right? And just even the language of, like, you're. I warned you, I will not tolerate mention of your abnormality under this roof. Screams his uncle. Right? Like, this is how people were treated with mental health conditions.

I mean, this is, frankly how people are still treated with mental health conditions. It's like you have something major. You go over there, right? You are not like us. You are unwanted. But that changes when we leave with love. Okay? So I found a way to loop it back to love. And Shannon, I saw your comments quickly come by about not having engaged with the Harry Potter series, but now maybe looking at it in that way and taking a look at it again, I've, you know, I've never read Harry Potter, but I've seen blips of some of the movies sometimes when they're on old school tv or, I don't know, just somehow you kind of, it's in pop culture and you kind of understand some of the, some of the stories.

But just this idea of. Could this be a commentary about magic, about, about. Not magic, about mental health, about how people are treated when they are, quote unquote different? And what from here can we learn about leading with love, right? He is with his very unloving aunt and uncle and cousin for eleven years of his life, and then he gets invited into this world where people love him and honor him and are just like, awestruck by him. And then he's dumped back into this world over the summer of being treated like, you know, a servant and, you know, back into this world of unlove.

And kind of, it seems like over the course of these books, he's gonna jump back and forth between these little, these different worlds, right? And junk food junkie. Yes, I saw you said that the books have far greater detail, of course, than the movies, which makes total sense. They got a cut a lot. So I'm excited to actually really read through this a little bit more. And also somehow my son, my older son found this version of the book that has pictures. I obviously, no matter how hard I try, I can't find a page that has pictures.

So that's helpful to my little seven year old and also helpful to me because books are sometimes daunting without pictures from me. Oh, speak wonder. You're, your comment just disappeared. But I think it said we consider Harry Potter something loyalty and some other beautiful words that you used. But hey, guys, we need the comments on longer, but yeah, I think Harry Potter, you're right. It's about loyalty. It is about love. And maybe, just maybe, is it about mental health? I will keep reading and report back.

But this is the fo. This is. This is the stuff, folks, is everywhere around us. Our messages. Our messages about how to live as better humans, as good humans. And for me, tonight, the message is in Harry Potter. Friendship, loyalty and courage. Thank you, Jungkook junkie. Friendship, loyalty, courageous and 100%. There's a h*** of a lot of love in here, too, and a lot of unlove. But we need to see that unlove, that contrast, in order to see just how much Harry is loved and how loving Harry is, too.

So even in the same very first chapter, he is greeted by. Oh, sorry. In the second chapter, he's greeted by this elf named Dobby. And you know Dobby. And Harry asks Dobby to sit down, and Dobby's like, no one's ever asked. No wizard has ever asked me to sit down. I'm lesser than you. How could you possibly ask me to sit down? And he says this. Oh, here. Oh, Harry Potter. Harry Potter asks if he can help Dobby. Dobby has heard of your greatness, sir, but of your goodness. Dobby never knew. And. Ooh, that struck me.

Don't we all want to be great? We all want to strive for greatness, but, oh, it's in the goodness. That's where it's at. The goodness, how we act toward one another. Greatness is all about. Look at me, look what I've done. But goodness is about how we treat others. And so. I love that line, too, dude. I can just mark up this whole book tonight. We'll see. And here's my other son, my older son, peaking and listening to what I have to say. What do you think? Do you agree? Sure. Kindness goes a long way with anyone.

Jung fujiang junkie. Yes. Kindness. Kindness. Kindness. Um, so that's what I got for you tonight. An insight from Harry Potter. If you've read it, go back and read it again with this lens of looking at magic as a mental health condition instead, or a neurodiversity instead, and see if it plays out in a similar way. Um, and keep leading with love. And sleep well. Tonight. I'm wishing you love, strength and awareness. Bye. Good night.