Live with Dr.Charryse 🧠 “Instant Gratification vs. Delayed and Hard Earned Gratification”

Kaidrosphere. Good morning. I hope you are doing as well as possible. It is Wednesday and here we are together on live with Dr. Charisse. If this is your first time here, I'm glad that you chose to show up for yourself and meet us and join us in this space. For those of you that are here on a regular basis, welcome back. How's your week going? That's what we do. Good morning, Andrea. We come in and we start off. Hello, T. Brown with how's your week? Where are you? Rate your week right one to ten.

One meaning the week has overtaken you. Hello from buffalo. And then 10 meaning you are crushing it. This week I will do the same. So I would say that my rating is probably. Audrey, I'm right in line with you, about a six, seven. Not terrible. Thank you for the hearts. Always appreciate them. Good morning. But hello Northern Minnesota. I have a lot of week ahead and so that always gives me an opportunity to decide where I want to go. A. rating. Your week is a self regulation skill. So it's not just some random dynamic that I choose for no reason.

It is a genuine way. Way to go, Jules. Glad you're having a nine week. Hello Statesboro. It's a genuine way for you to start. Stop in the middle of the week and go, how am I doing? How am I feeling? What needs to change? Hello, Philly. What do I need to improve? So whenever you rate your week, I always want you along with that rating to then ask yourself, where do I want to land? How can I at the least maintain where I am? Because sometimes maintaining where you are is a win, right? But if I don't want to maintain, I want better.

If I want to end stronger than I started. Hello, Georgia. Then what can I do so that I move through the week and see that I regained it, I reclaimed it, so forth and so on. Today let's get into the dynamic between short term satisfaction and long term hard earned satisfaction. Or you can even think immediate gratification versus long term hard earned. I'm always going to say that gratification, which is always going to be better for your brain and for you on a sustainable kind of light. Why is it important?

It is very easy for us to trace or chase. Let me say dopamine hits things that give us quick burst and boost our mood. But then over time we're doing those things too much. Those things can become addictions. Even good things, if they're not given the right boundaries, can become something that is too much. You can be addicted to achievement for example, hi, Jackie. And while there's nothing wrong with achievement, you get to a certain point in life where you're like, I've achieved a lot. I don't know what else is next and I don't know what to do.

I was having this conversation with someone the other day and they're at a place in life where they've, you know, they've gone through a lot of achievements. They're in a place, they're like, I love my life, I love where I am. But then they realized they didn't know who they are. They were like, now that there's not something to achieve, there's no destination addiction. They didn't know what to do with themselves. They hadn't built a quality of life that they like. So that's one dynamic. Another dynamic is if we look from a neuroscience perspective.

Serotonin, which is the long term, hard earned gratification, is what we want. Dopamine, short, it gets you there, it might get you started, but it's not sustainable because it always keeps you wanting more. And ideally, although you will hear me talk about doing dopamine, boosting activities that are not addictive, the key is get enough dopamine so that you start building the serotonin so that you start having the confidence, the mood and the understanding of how do I keep myself in a good place of well being.

So if you're taking notes, you will want to put a line down the paper. On one side put dopamine and on the other side put serotonin. So let's talk very quickly about dopamine. Dopamine is triggered by short term acts of pleasure. These are things and activities that boost the reward center of the brain, which isn't horrible, but it depends on what you use to boost it. Fun fact though, dopamine only touches five receptors of the brain. And that is why it's not like the ultimate. It's just a gateway into the long term work that produces the sustainable gain.

So triggered by short acts of short term pleasure touches five brain receptors. The thing about dopamine is it's often addictive. I'll give you an example. A lot of food can create a dopamine hit. So how we get into emotional eating, general addictions, sugar addictions, alcohol addictions, drug addictions, substance addictions, sex addictions, shopping addictions are those short term pleasurable things. And how you'll know that what you're doing is more on the end of short term versus long term is you're always wanting more.

When you are getting dopamine in ways that are not ideal. Long term, it's kind of never enough. You keep wanting more and sometimes that more has consequence. Where on the other hand, when it comes to serotonin, serotonin is so rich and so necessary. Here are four things that serotonin does before I get into that side of the chart. Helps with mood regulation. When we have a good degree of serotonin, then our mood is going to be significantly better. It helps with regulating sleep. So sometimes you may realize that if you're struggling with sleep, that part of your issue may be that you might actually be low in serotonin.

Other things that dopamine does and impacts is appetite control. So when you have a adequate or high degree of serotonin, your cravings or your ability to make choices that align with your value are always going to be significantly higher. So if you find that you are in a place where you've been kind of struggling with, with what you're consuming and not struggling because you're doing anything bad, all foods fit, but struggling in the sense of, hey, I'm not getting in things the way I have in my head or I'm caught on something that I can't figure out.

Oh, good example, let's out yourselves. I'll do the same. Tell me a food that you know for you is a hit of dopamine that you know, yeah, this is not serotonin producing because when I have it, I want more or if I kind of get started with it, food or drink, it's, it's hard to stop. For me, that food, I'm trying to think if it's a food or food group. I would say it can be salty, crunchy, so I would say like chips or popcorn. I don't avoid them. But if I start, oh, we're not having just a little bit, right?

And then it becomes, yeah, chocolate, cereal, sweets, carbs, pasta. Then it becomes, I want a little bit of that every day. And, and that is a red flag when I'm recognizing, okay, I had that and now I want it every day for the next two weeks. That is not within our normal range of how we choose food. So doesn't mean that you can't have those things, but it does mean pay attention and recognize me. Getting this little hint of dopamine through something that I know is a gateway for me is not producing the long term serotonin that I need, it actually depletes it.

But serotonin, mood regulation, sleep, appetite control and cognitive functioning. So I love it when we get adequate serotonin, when we're doing things that help produce adequate serotonin, our cognitive functioning is better, our decision making is better, our memory is better. Oh, I am active, absolutely. The person who, when things are off and my serotonin is low, one of the first places that I recognize it is in my memory. I almost feel like there are brain zaps in my head and I can't remember simple things that I would recall all the time.

So it's even a little bit different than a brain fog when it's one literally like, okay, why can I not remember the name of this person? Why can I not remember the name of this place? Oh, I'm at the store and my head is so scattered, I don't even know what I needed to purchase. But that can be induced by high moments of stress, low moments of serotonin, and then I know, okay, I need to go support myself, support my system and then try all of these things again. So what makes serotonin different than dopamine?

It's triggered by acts of long term satisfaction, things that are long term, that satisfy you. But let's also add that do require some effort on your part. So we can't just sit back and go, oh, I need serotonin today. I'm going to just sit here with my hands up and see if I receive it. It doesn't work that way. But there are things that we can do and when we do them consistently, then we will build up our serotonin. And of course it's priceless and very helpful. Serotonin touches 14 brain receptors, whereas remember, dopamine only touch five.

So it's mega, it's phenomenal, it's what you want. When we are doing things that also help increase our serotonin, they are typically non addictive. There are things that we enjoy, they're things that bring us satisfaction, but we have a much more difficult time overdoing it. And then two things that I left out. When we think about the mindset that goes along with dopamine versus serotonin. So you can put this at the bottom of your dopamine list. The dopamine list is always wanting more. I just wanted to highlight as that is the mindset, whereas the serotonin mindset is being grateful for what you have.

So even if you don't get anything out of all of the neuroscience that I gave you, I want you to continue to ask yourself as you go throughout your week, what am I noticing about the way I'm engaging With life, the way I'm engaging with substances, the way I'm engaging with my time. Am I in a place that I'm always wanting more, or am I grateful for what I have because this came to my mind? Let me add this in. Have you ever been in a season where you've realized that you spent a lot of time doom scrolling, flipping through social media on your phone, zoned out over and over?

If that's you say, maybe you don't have to say yes or no. You can be like, maybe that's an example of dopamine. Because if you find that you get on your phone and you start scrolling through and you tell yourself, oh, I'm only going to do this for a few minutes. And then you look up and it's been an hour, you literally just put yourself in a dopamine coma. And while zoning out may have gotten you a little bit of reprieve, it's not sustainable and you want more. I love it. Maybe if you've ever found.

We'll talk about it yourself. Staying up late because it's the only time you get to yourself, right? Two hours later, watching Netflix, watching a show, whatever it is that you do, and then that becomes a habit that then impacts your ability to get up the next morning and start your day strong. Then you're in a dopamine crash that has become an addictive habit. So anything that you're doing or participating in or eating or ingesting that you cannot stop easily and you feel drawn to and compelled to is dopamine and not necessarily adaptive long term.

Now, what are. I'll leave you with this. Some things that you can do that help increase your serotonin. Exercise, sunlight exposure. I cannot say enough. Please make sure you're getting outside. I know that for most of us it is freezing cold, but you need that sunlight. And the earlier in the day you can get that sunlight, the more serotonin you will produce. And it also helps with your melatonin, which helps you rest. So morning sunlight is phenomenal, even if that just means you open all the windows and go stand near.

Exercise, sunlight exposure, a healthy diet that has, well rounded proteins, carbs and fats, mindfulness and meditation and then social interaction. So when we are engaged with people that are life giving, not people that drain us, that is also a really powerful way to, you know, create serotonin. So pay attention to who you're around. Sweet. All right, so how can you take this and move it from thought to action? 1. Take inventory of your recent habits what are you noticing? Are you noticing that you're on the end of the dopamine hits, getting all these quick fixes and feel like you're in a rut and trying to get out of it?

Or are you in a good place where you're actually putting in some vital habits where you are practicing doing things that you know help increase your serotonin? Yes, early morning porch time is incredible. It's a great way to also hold gratitude. Right? I want to stop for a moment. Anyone have any questions? I want to make sure that I continue to give a little space for that around anything that I share today today around dopamine and serotonin. I'll wait for just a moment. If you need to hop off, have a phenomenal rest of the day.

And those of you that are listening on Replay, I'm glad that you came. Replay is always available. Come back as much as you want to myself any of the other providers and contributors here and don't forget that you can also come into Cadre and and you can put in a theme, an emotion, an issue, a challenge that you're having in life and it will help you pre populate videos and contributors that may be talking about the things that would be helpful to you. All right, have a great day and I will see you all on Sunday.