Working On Our Rebound Rate

Hello everyone. Happy Friday. It is gorgeous. Today I decided to take the day off of my full time job. So that was a wise decision on my part just to kind of have some, some time to myself and, and extend this three day weekend into a four day weekend. Hope that you all are. Hi Anna. Hope that you all are enjoying it. Hi Tammy. And if you're watching this at a different point, I hope that you're enjoying whatever day is happening for you. So. Hi Sarah, Welcome. Very happy to be here again. I feel like I'm just getting this good stretch of good Friday weather.

Hey Andy Mack. And really grateful for that. Hi. Dream big. And I know that it's been a heavy week here where, where I am and just a lot to take in. And it works out that working on our rebound rate is, is literally the perfect thing for such, such an occasion here. And I want to just start off by having us notice where we are. Like orient ourselves to whatever room we're in even if we're in the car. Like just orient yourself to a cottage that your car. Orient in your body feeling what's happening inside and just taking a few deep breaths to notice our breath to maybe take a break.

I don't know if you're on, on your lunch break or maybe you are getting ready to go to work later this evening or maybe you don't have to work at all today. But regardless, let's try to go into our bodies just for a second. Because the quicker we realize that we're this living being, having an inner experience with the outside world, the freer we can become in letting ourselves be at ease. And life is not always going to be at ease. There's always going to be certain things that come at us and trigger us or affect us and hit our stuff.

And that's okay. We're here to learn, we're here to grow. And when we're present is when we're most connected to truth. It's when we're most connected to reality. And reality is a little bit of a tricky word given that people think what's going on in here is reality. And it is, it's their version of reality. But there's also a version of reality for every other person. But there's also this entire world that has a reality going on all over with experiences that we have no say or way to partake in.

And sometimes thinking bigger than ourselves is the answer just to kind of get out of our stuff. Hopefully. People. I'm connecting. Okay, I see a couple people have left and Come back. So hopefully, hopefully we're going good there. But I did want to really just reiterate, like, kind of what this presence, my practice of presence has taught me, and that is that a rebound rate is a really crucial part of a practice to being more present. So what's a rebound rate? Well, let's start with a runner, right?

And you can. We can use any type of analogy, but let's just use a runner. For example, you're going around, you're maybe on mile one, maybe on your first 10 minutes, and. Or maybe for you, that's both. You're kind of thinking about, like, an email you have to send or your to do list or anything that is preoccupying your mind. And then all of a sudden, you turn around the corner and you just see this, like, beautiful scenery. The breeze is hitting you, right? It's. It's just this, like, aha. Oh, right.

I'm here running, not thinking. That's an example of, like, catching ourselves to come back into what we were doing. And so, like, as a runner, you can decide, like, oh, yeah, I'm here. I'm going to get my presence in my feet. I'm going to step, I'm going to work on my form again. I'm going to go back to my breathing in and out, my cadence. Or we can decide to kind of just go back to the endless narrative and conversation that's constantly happening in our head. So I always am reminded when I'm running or walking that, oh, shoot, I lost it.

I'm in my head again. And so I feel like this happens all the time for me. I don't know if you guys have any examples that you catch it and notice it. Like, you're driving and then all of a sudden you miss an exit or you get home and you're like, wow, I was totally in my head that entire time I was driving and I was on autopilot. Like, kind of scary, but kind of true. Like, it happens. I'm guilty. Or you're in a meeting and you're listening to respond and not actually really listening to what they're saying because you're preparing what you want to say and how you want to influence.

And so these moments come at us all the time, and it's really just showing us how much our mind wanders. And when our mind is wandering and we're thinking, we're really experiencing reality through a filter. We're not experiencing reality as, like, this truth of what's coming up. And when all of us are Experiencing stuff through our filters, what do you think happens? A little bit of disconnect, a little bit of miscommunication. A little bit of my way is better than your way, or this, that and the other.

And so really fine tuning our rebound rate to catch, oh, yeah, shoot, I lost it. Or, oh, yeah, shoot, I am totally looking at this through a filter in. In my lens and just being open to the fact that we get off course pretty often. And it's the human predicament. And it's not terrible. It's. It's just something we have to go grow through and experience to come out of sometimes. And I found that there's really kind of three steps that we can take. This. And everything is in threes, I feel like. Right.

Like. And the first step really to shorten the gap of our rebound, right? So that we're being present longer and coming back quicker when we lose this moment or the next moment. Really, number one is just to notice. Really noticing that, oh, man, I was stuck in my narrative. I was stuck in my melodrama. I was stuck in my story or in the emotion of it, right? Like, I was so angry on Wednesday. Just, like, angry. And then I was sad and that. And it took. I was like, whew, okay, Like, I had to notice it.

And with noticing comes processing. We have to process these, like, tough emotions. And some are easier than others, right? Like, anger is fierce. We gotta work with anger, right? We can't, like, bypass these negative things we don't want to feel or experience. We wanna allow it to come up and be released rather than stay and stir inside and fester and cause us to do things from a very not good place. So noticing and processing and being aware that, okay, this is where I'm at and this is what's coming up.

And I may need to sit with it for a day. I may need to just sit with it for a few days. That's fine. We have the power within ourselves to know, okay, this one's gonna. This one hit. This really struck a chord with me. So this might take me a little bit longer than normal. I'm gonna be patient with myself. And so noticing as we process what is arising within us so that we can release it to then, you know, move to step two, which is to decide. We have the capability to decide what we want to do, what we have control over and how we want to control ourselves.

And do we want to take inspired action or do we want to process this a little bit longer? Do we need more time to Let go. But we need to decide. Okay, I was out. I kind of lost the present moment and lost track of the situation because I was stuck in my filter narrative about it. I need to decide that I don't want to. I want to be clear. That's usually the decision I try to go with is I want to be clear and I want to be closer to truth. You know, even if the truth hurts, because, boy, the truth hurts sometimes.

And can we, when we're choosing either truth or deciding to take the next step or deciding to move on or whatever, can we do this from a high place? We have to make a decision from a high place. Otherwise we're just in this reactive energy. And when one person's reactive and does it to another and is reactive to another person, it's like this ripple effect of just ra. Which, you know, conflict can be the beginning of harmony. Sure, definitely. However, if you go back to how you felt at the beginning of this talk where you just took a few breaths and oriented and you were calmer, you know, we often make better decisions and have better outcomes when we're coming from a place of groundedness, clarity, truth, kindness, openness, rather than being closed, projecting, still being angry, needing to be right, wanting to prove ourselves from this insecure place.

What the examples are endless but taking note of. Are we deciding from the highest place? Finally, number three is to let go or to take inspired action from the decision that you came with. Letting go is often the best thing I found. I feel like life is all about letting go every day I am reminded of that Sarah says cultivating safety within is powerful. Yes, safety, you betcha. Safety is crucial and it is a feeling. I'm glad you said that. Because when we feel safe, we perform better, we create better, we communicate better, we give and receive better.

So yeah, safety. Safety is huge. And when we are taking inspired action, we're going to take better inspired action. When we feel safe, we're going to let go. When we feel safe to do so. And practicing safety is a huge thing. And we'll dive into that a lot more in September. But for our rebound rate is, do we feel safe, like taking this inspired action? Do we feel safe in our bodies to even have the time to notice and process, do we feel safe and acknowledging that, like, we're not perfect, we are.

My mind went wild and I got to accept that. I gotta honestly savor that. Savor that humanness within us. That, boy, I really shifted. Something changed and it came at me and I had to savor this Change. I had to savor my ability to notice my rebound rate, savor these emotions that are coming up that are privileged, probably uncomfortable. I know that I was just like very uncomfortable for a lot of certain things that were arising this week. And that is the process, so savoring that process of figuring it out and working towards our ourselves, working towards our better selves, best versions of ourselves, higher decision making versions of ourselves and whatnot, we can do that.

We can talk it out with friends and family or on Cadre. We have the capability to acknowledge where we're at. And so taking the highest form of action requires you to feel safe. It requires you to acknowledge and savor the fact that we lost reality for a second. We just lost it. We got into our stories, we got into our preferences, we got into our likes and dislikes or habits, right? Habitual thinking. And so sometimes we just have to ask, where is our mind and can we handle this change? Can we adapt with this change and come out on a higher level of openness, empathy and understanding of ourselves and others?

It's hard to put our shoes in other people's, put our feet in other people's shoes because we simply haven't had the experiences that they have. And that's where understanding your filters and how we see reality will help you see and understand other people's filters. And then it doesn't really have to provoke us as much because we're just like, they're doing the best they can with what they've got. I'm doing the best I can with what I got. Everyone's doing the best they can with what we've got.

And our rebound rate is a great example of doing that. We're doing the best we can. We're trying to come back to alignment. We're trying to come back to truth. We're trying to come back to the reality that we're all coexisting in together. Even though there's friction, even though there's chaos, even though there is beauty and harmony and love as well. We have the opportunity to begin again by again working on our rebound rate. Coming, coming back to the present moment. They call it the present for a reason, because it's a gift.

As cliche as it sounds, it is true. And the present moment will set us free. The present moment will allow us to truly savor more often. It will allow us to see the constant change and evolve with it rather than resist against it. It. And our rebound rate is just one, one tool to, to get us there. And so I Hope that there is something inside of you today that is ready to acknowledge, yes, I lost this present moment even just listening to me chat and blab for 20 minutes. Right? Probably are doing a chore or something like that.

We're only human. But I hope that you can come back and say, oh silly me, I wandered off again. Like that's that it's just, it's okay. And accept it and try to just learn from like, oh, where, where does my mind like to go? Where Is it the future, the past? Is it people that p***** me off? Is it something I wish I would have said? Is it whatever it is, just being curious about where our minds take us. And there was a stat from like a Harvard study recently and I can share it in the comments after this, but that like our minds wander like 48% of the time and, and wander by meaning like we're not present, we're thinking about something else, which I actually think is kind of low.

Personally I thought it would be higher, but that's a lot. It's a lot of time to miss the present moment, right? A lot of times to be elsewhere when right here. And like, yes, life can be really tumultuous sometimes and painful. However, if you look at it overall, if you look outside, there's plenty of, plenty of beauty to be shared around. And not every day can certainly feel like that. But when, when we do notice and savor those moments of change, of constant, of whatever is coming in reality, then we can be helpful to our community, helpful to ourselves.

And to recap our rebound rate steps just so, so that you can take a chance or take a try this, this, this weekend to see how it goes for you. I'd love to hear about it. Notice and process. Process what you're feeling. Notice what triggered you, our triggers, our teachers. Notice. Secondly, decide do you need more time to process? Do you need to do something to get into a higher state? And when you do, decide what you're going to do about the situation, try to be in a high state. Try to work on making a decision from a high state as much as you possibly can.

And three is letting go or taking inspired action. Letting go is always great. We don't want to, we want to cleanse ourselves. I mean the yogi in me is always just like, let's pure verify whatever's inside and stuck. Like let's get it out. My rule of thumb is if it's not happening in front of me, I don't want it happening inside of me. And that's not true. Or that's not available in all cases. But. And we can still choose to decide to let go or take inspired action. So rebound rate. It's a good one.

I. I'll give credit to Gabby Bernstein. She was the one that taught me about rebound. Right? Like, how can we come back again and again as much as possible? Because it's the name of the game is being present, baby. We can. We can do it. But appreciate everyone hopping on here. I know it was a long one. Let me know if there are any rebound rates that you notice sometimes or that you're like, I get stuck in this a lot. I would love to hear it. My name is Bri. I am a wellness and fitness coach and for maintaining alignment.

So I'd love to connect with you here on Cadre or elsewhere. But I hope that everybody has a great rest of their day, a great weekend and I continue to work on that rebound rate. Come back to our truth, to our authentic selves, to life. Living life in the. In the good lane, in the love lane. Bye.