JOMO vs FOMO

What's going on, Cadre fam? Hello, Cadre. It's Jill and Mary, your resident hype girls, your energy queens. And today we want to bring a conversation to you around the concept of foMo. Have you heard of it? I'm sure you have. It is the fear of missing out. The fear of missing out. I was having a conversation with a girlfriend the other day about a community event that we were both invited to, and she was asking me whether I was going or not, and I said, no, I am not. She got this look on her face like, oh, my God.

What? You're not going. Why? And I was like, Gina, it's because I practice Jomo. And she said, what's Jomo? And I said, it's the joy of missing out, as opposed to the fear of missing out, because so many of us experience the fear of missing out. Right. Especially concerning social media. People show us what they want us to see, what they're buying, where they're traveling, who they're hanging out with, where they're hanging out with that person. And that makes us feel like where we are is not good enough.

I am a total yes girl. I over commit, and I don't know if anyone can relate to that. When I finally learned how to practice Jomo, that was a game changer for me, because what I did in over committing myself was I didn't. I never felt like I could enjoy where I really was because I was onto the next. Onto the next. So as opposed to me saying yes, I now really get to evaluate when I do say yes and commit to it. But even if I notice that I'm not going to a party that I really wanted to go to, how can I be okay in that moment to enjoy.

Enjoy what I'm doing versus feeling like I'm missing out, right? Because what I have found over the years, I am the total opposite of jill. I am not an over committer. I really enjoy my personal space, and I'm very protective of my schedule, which is why the two of us work as business partners so well. But what I've noticed over the years is usually if I say yes to those things or I feel over committed or I'm trying to zhuzh my schedule to make something work, that's just not fitting, I find that the thing that I'm going to that I feared missing out on wasn't as good as the pictures made it look to begin with.

It's so true, right? It's so true. You seeing, like, oh, that party, that. That event, that whatever it may be. Oh, my gosh. And then you go and you make all of, all of the things happen, and you're like, it's a letdown. I'm really ready to go back home. Right? And I've you. It's like sticking your hand on the hot stove. You have to do it in order to figure it out. But what I've also learned in that is there's always going to be another party. There's always going to be another occasion. There's always going to be something else for you to invest your time, energy, and money into.

And if you can't make that thing happen, it's okay. It's totally okay. And in order to shift your perspective from the fear of missing out, how can you see it? Like Jill just said, what are you doing right then and there? That's just as valuable as the thing that you're missing out on. And change it to jomo. This thing that I missed out on, that my coworker was so like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're not coming. Why? I said, jomo, gina, jomo. And she goes, what's that joy of missing out? Introducing that concept to her.

She has since texted me a couple of times and said, mary, viewing. This is a game changer. I don't have to be everywhere or everything for everybody if I'm excited experiencing the joy of missing out. Like, hey, have fun. Have fun. Looks like a great time, y'all. Can't wait to hear all about it. Can't wait to hear all about it. No strings attached. So your challenge, your challenge this week, today, if you say yes to something, you're going to say no to something else. So remember that. Remember that your time and energy and presence is perfectly okay where you are practicing Jomo instead of foMo.

We can't wait to hear comment below, too, and let us know where you're practicing Jomo as opposed to fomo. Bye, you guys.