Part 7

Hey, cadre family, Dr. Kerry here. This is stories from the ER part seven. Oh Another tough day at work on this story. Um, I was working in the trauma bay on this particular day in the level one trauma center ER and I had the immense pleasure of caring for a mom and baby that were shot and You know what we we got shootings stabbings like on a regular basis in this urban city So this was not an uncommon call But it it was a more challenging one for many reasons for me So I ended up responding to the trauma bay the patient was coming in they were actually doing really well The baby was about this is more like a toddler is about two years old.

It was in a stroller Mom was walking down the street and they got literally caught in crossfire Um from like a gang related shooting like just seriously wrong place wrong time And it's just it's hard. It's hard to hear those stories, right? m. m. m And had I worked that shift that day It was quite possible. I would have been caught in crossfire on my bike where I had to work Because I bike commuted every day And this was like downtown in a city like we're not talking like Some sketchy area of town that I was like biking through we're talking like just an urban city I would bike to work and I went back to my desk at my computer and I started shaking And this fear just came over me and I realized Oh my gosh.

I could have been shot today Like the reality of that just hit me this woman and her walking her kid in the stroller Like down the street to go run errands or wherever they were going didn't imagine they were going any shot um just Walking out in the middle of the street and I'm like I literally could have been shot today And I ended up kind of having like a little bit of a panic attack and had a really amazing supervisor This is when you know you have a good boss Because he immediately noticed that something wasn't right with me and I I like said I need to go take a break for a few minutes and I went to the bathroom and I started crying And I was like oh my gosh.

My sense of like safety has been shattered like you think walking down that street biking down that street is Is safe. It's normal to the middle of the day And like I never thought twice about biking to work and being caught and crossfire being shot Right like but I also never thought that I would go out to meet my friend at a bar And get attacked at a knife point and stranger raped and stabbed when I was 21 So like these things happen, you know, like it's it's unfortunate but these horrific things happen and the trauma that comes out of that is obviously just tremendous but Your sense of reality your sense of safety It just becomes like immediately comes crashing down when something like this happens And this didn't even happen to me, but it could have And I've seen so many people especially that work in these kind of industries with you know, like first responders er like You think you're pretty invincible Because you managed to get through life without you know, getting in these massive car racks You know finding your your your partner dead on the floor with the needle in their arm Like there's a lot of us that go through life pretty sheltered from these kinds of trauma And then there's those of us that don't and that do experience those kinds of trauma But on a day-to-day basis, you don't think about those things, right?

You don't think that I might walk down the street today and get shot So when your sense of safety is shattered like that could have happened to me It's pretty profound because we all have this innate sense of wanting to live And wanting to be safe, right? It's a basic human need So needless to say my supervisor took me aside He's like I think you should take longer than five minutes kerry and let's let 's talk about this And I just like lost it. I was bawling my eyes out I couldn't stop I was like hyperventilating and I said I could have been shot today I could have been shot today and he's like yeah, you could have And he just validated me and then said And you weren't And you were able to rise above what happened today and care for those people And I don't know why that stuff happens.

I don't know why this bad things happen to people But I want you to focus on where we are right now You're safe right now And you take all the time that you need and oh my gosh, what an amazing leader To be able to say I recognize that right now your mental health is the utmost priority because if you can't get your shit together You can't take care of other people today That being aside, but like truly care about and cared about me And so if you Manage people you're a leader of people I want you to take the lesson from this guy from my supervisor And just see your people as humans Because sometimes we forget and we think that they are just machines and they they should just be in performance mode work mode when they're at work And nothing will affect them and unfortunately that's not always a case Because stuff comes up that you did not expect And I just had an incredible supervisor that really saw me and got me what I needed that day And then secondly also just give yourself a little bit of grace That sometimes things come out of nowhere and they might take you out mentally for a little bit and that's okay Um because I was really disappointed in myself with the trauma that I've been through that this like hit me so hard But I gotta remember that like this would hit anybody hard Like this is normal that this affected you and it's okay that it affected you So if things have affected you, it's okay because You probably had a really valid reason for being affected.

So that's what I wanted to share with you guys today Just that really like You know sense of safety Feeling that we all have and sometimes when that gets shattered it can really Really disrupt things and that's okay Just give yourself some patience and grace if you're going through that right now So thank you for tuning in with this story. God bless