Make Your Dreams Come True!

Good morning. I've got my blue light glasses on. Give everybody a second to jump in. It's Friday again. Every time I hop on these things I say it's Friday. It's always Friday when I hop on here. I'll give everybody a second, see if anyone's going to jump in, see if people got the notification, and then I will get this party started. You can see like the corner of my dog's paw, like in the corner of the couch, just passed out. He's already had a morning. Good afternoon, junk food junkie. Hello. It's so good to see you.

Thank you for always being present for all of our lives. You are amazing. I hope we get to meet in person one day. I'm going to go ahead and get started. You probably noticed I'm wearing these very studious looking glasses. They are blue light glasses. I did not get glasses. I don't have glasses, which is so funny at this point in my life. Like I had them once after my car accident because I had blurry vision and then my vision corrected itself because I was so young it must have just like, you know, after PTSD corrected itself.

But now I need glasses, you guys. I don't, what's up, Katie? What's up, Carrie? I was just talking about my glasses. But I am avoiding getting glasses, you guys. And my live today is all about avoidance. And so what's really funny is I love wearing my blue light glasses, but when it comes to actual glasses, hi Marissa. Oh my gosh. It doesn't look like the ring light is reflecting in your glasses. Okay, good. Thank you. It's all I can see. But when it comes to getting regular glasses, you guys, I am avoiding it like the plague.

Isn't that funny? I'm like, oh yeah, I'll throw on my blue light glasses, no problem. They make me look studious and smart. But when it comes to getting real glasses, which I actually need for far vision, my close-up is fine, but it's a far away vision. When it comes to that, why am I avoiding that? But I'll have no problem popping on Amazon, buying myself a pair of blue light glasses, and I really got to thinking as it pertains to my big dreams, you know that's what I'm here to talk about every Friday, this whole concept of avoidance and avoidance versus accountability.

And I just was like, I have to talk about this because I think it's really important when it comes to conquering your big dreams. So the other thing I wanted to mention was it's tax season. And let me tell you something else. I avoid tax season like I mean, it comes every year, right? Like it's one thing to avoid getting a prescription for your glasses. I guess you could put that off. But taxes, they creep around every year. And I don't know about you guys, but I get this massive amount of anxiety when I have to do my taxes.

And I don't know if it's because me and numbers are not very good friends, but I hate tax season. And I'm sure that that's every accountant's nightmare to hear that. Like I have friends who are so organized, they write down all their mileage, they keep everything intact, they have a folder, like they do all the things. And I do professional organizing for a living for people for their closets. Why is it that I want to avoid tax season like the plague, like the glasses? What is my problem? It gives me so much stress and anxiety.

And so in all of this thinking about like the season of year that we're in and just this whole concept of like avoidance versus accountability, I just felt like I needed to talk about it. So it kind of made me think about like where else, where else am I avoiding the hard things in order to get to the other side? And how are those avoidances hindering my growth and hindering my ability to go after the things that I know I need and want and that I think can get me to the pot of gold on the other side of the rainbow.

So I wanted to acknowledge the places that I've been avoiding lately to speak it out loud and then take accountability and then talk about, sorry the dog, this could be a thing for a few minutes. Come here, Wally, come here. There's just no getting around my paw patrol in the window. I'm so sorry. Okay, so the places that I feel like I have been avoiding lately, I'm gonna share them with you. And then we'll have an exercise at the end. Number one, conflict with a loved one. I have recently had a little bit of conflict with somebody that I love near and dear, somebody that is so near and dear to my heart that I love that is, you know, a family member.

And we don't typically have conflict. We don't typically, we always see eye to eye. We don't typically argue. We don't really call each other out on anything. We have like a pretty, I guess, even relationship, although maybe not always the healthiest, but not a lot of reason, let's say. We don't live near each other. usually our relationship is pretty seamless and we can have really communicative like conversation. And we can say the hard things, but like we don't really have conflict really, right?

We have great communication, but not conflict. And I have been avoiding this communication with this person that I love so much. because it feels really, really uncomfortable, really uncomfortable. I was telling her a story. I hit a hot button. She didn't like it. And I really, I think offended her. And I fully apologized in that moment because she called me right out. I fully apologized. And then I sent a follow-up text just like feeling so shameful. And didn't get a response to that text and just kind of the communication after that, we've talked again, but the communication after that hasn't been great.

And it really hurts my heart. And now I'm like avoiding it. Now I'm like, oh gosh, okay, my apology really wasn't received. this person is clearly upset with me. I'm just going to avoid this. I'm just going to avoid it. I don't want to deal with it. I'm going to be small in my communication and I'm going to be meek and I'm not going to really say much. And I've been avoiding it. Not the best thing to do, but I'm going to keep going through my account, my account or my avoidance here. Taxes. I just talked about that.

I am avoiding taxes like the plague. like getting the glasses, avoiding it. My poor accountant is like, please send in this, please submit this. And for some reason, I am debilitated by just getting done what needs to get done. I have a Trello. I have organizational to-do lists. I know exactly what I need to do and I have everything. But why is it that I am putting that off and I'm like, oh, oh my gosh, the dishes need to get done. I'm just going to go ahead and go do the dishes. Or I'm going to go fold those sheets over there that have been sitting unfolded in a basket for 25 days.

I'm looking for things to do and excuses and anything I can do to not deal with my taxes, but they have to get done. Why would I wait until the last minute? Why don't I want to deal with this? It's causing a blockage. What is going on? So that's another place where I'm avoiding. And then a third thing that I'm avoiding lately is social activities. And I'm a very social person, but I've recently learned about myself in the last like year or two that I'm an ambivert so I'm an introvert extrovert and I really like my alone time and I really like being at home and I really don't love love to go out and be social and interact with people unless it's like a have to situation, unless it's like a charity event or a special event that my friend really wants me to be at to support them.

Like I love supporting people, but for some reason I have been avoiding going out and doing things and sort of like living my life when I'm in a state of stress. When I have things going on in my life, I'm like, nope, I just need to be home. I need to be grounded because it feels so, safe. And I thought about some of these things that I am avoiding lately. And I was like, gosh, like these, are things that I need to face head on. And I'll tell you why in a second. So on the other side of that, I've taken accountability for a few things.

I've recently been working on my more direct communication. So I did make that apology to that person that I am, I do have a conflict with now. It's still, there's still some lingering conflict going, but I did make, I took full responsibility and accountability and I apologize right away. So I've been really trying to be a lot more direct in my communication. You can still lead with kindness. You can still lead with kindness, but you can be direct. And I've been really working on that because I think that the more direct communication I have, the more clear my brain feels and the less I'll want to stew on it or talk about it in another capacity.

So I'm trying to go and just state how I'm feeling, state what's going on in this situation, and do it in a way that I feel is effective. Well, I'm not always effective, but I'm doing the best I can there, right? Another thing is, you know, like I just said, an acknowledgement of my mistakes. I love taking ownership of my mistakes. I love saying, I really messed up there because I think it gives other people permission to do the same thing. And I think if we can practice that a lot more, we can live in a more of a homeostatic world.

Is that even a word? I know homeostasis is, but I just made that up, I think. Somebody Webster that for me. Okay. And then the last thing I feel like I've been doing, taking accountability is sharing my feelings. Sharing, you know, instead of shaming myself, sharing how I feel, sitting with it, being okay talking about it, talking to somebody else about it, writing it down, like allowing myself to feel all of my feelings and then giving myself the permission to move through them when I am ready.

So I'm taking accountability there. But all of this to say, we've got avoidance and we've got accountability. And how does this play a part in accomplishing the goals that we want to accomplish? How does this affect making our big dreams come true? Well, if you sit in the avoidance, if you sit there knowing My favorite quote is, we always end up at the truth, so you might as well start there. It's the same thing with avoidance. You're always going to end up, I hope, ending up at accountability. So if instead of avoiding from the start, if you can take accountability, step up and do it, and get past this whole blockage that avoidance creates, you are going to be that much closer to your big goals, that much closer.

I feel like it's important for us to face the challenges, crash through the wall, look them dead in the eye, and say, you know what? I'm going to have to deal with this at some point anyway. Why not start today? Thanks. You love my glasses. Junk Food Junkie says, I know that feeling. It's like trying to rebuild a bridge with the other person. yes. Oh my gosh. It's the building of the bridge is painful. Do you remember? Did you guys ever have to do that in grade school where you had to build a bridge with toothpicks?

and then you had to see whose bridge withstood the most weight or something. That's kind of how it feels. It's like building the toothbrick bridge. You're so right on about that. So going back to accountability and avoidance, you need to face these challenges because everything is on the other side of heart. So if you're just avoiding, avoiding, avoiding, avoiding, avoiding, what you're doing is you're creating a blockage. So your blockage starts really small and then it gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger the longer you wait and the longer you avoid.

So if you're facing these problems head on, you're dealing with them, you're taking accountability, you are keeping that bubble as small as you can. The goal is we're always going to have something that we need to face, always, right? We can blow a bubble and we're always gonna have, like we're always gonna be chewing the gum, right? We're always gonna be chewing the gum. But if we can keep that bubble as small as possible, it won't blow up in our face. just came to me, that bubble, this bubble analogy.

But with blockages comes freezing. You freeze in time and you You don't allow for space for the good things to come in, for the good things to come in. So have you ever held on to something for so long, like a secret or just, I don't know, even something that was just decluttering your space? The minute you let it go, you feel that freedom. It's the same thing when it comes to avoidances and how that plays a part in getting to the other side of our big goals. So what can you do in order to get past this?

For me, It's making a list of the things that I'm avoiding. It's a master life list. I do it probably monthly. And I go to that life list and I say, these are the things that are causing me stress, that are creating blockages that I have been avoiding. Make the list. Get yourself an accountability partner for the things that you think you need to be held accountable for, that you are willing to share with somebody else. When I have something that is holding me back, I love sharing it with a friend who's going to hold me accountable.

I love having that person that's going to be like, you said you were going to do this two months ago. Why haven't you done it? On the other side of that, I love being that person for somebody. I love being somebody's accountability partner. Please sign me up for that all day. I love holding people accountable. I love checking back in with them and saying, where are you at with this? So make your list of what you're trying to avoid and start putting it on the accountability side. So you've got your avoidance over here, you've got your accountability over here.

You want to dwindle this down and bring it all over to the accountability side because the minute you do that, you're going to clear space over here for all of the big things to happen in your life. So start chipping away at your avoidances and start taking accountability so you can come out on the other side and have all of this free space for all the great things that are meant to happen in your life. Junk Fu Junkie says the avoidance will eventually get a crack in it and you will need to face it.

That is so true straight on. I couldn't agree with you more. I could not agree with you more. Like the quote, the truth always comes out so you might as well start there. It will avoid so much of the telephone game and so much drama in your life, I knew what you meant, junk food jucky, I knew right what you meant, you will avoid so much conflict and drama in your life. And we're always going to have a little bit of it, right? But how quickly are you facing it so you can get to the next thing, right?

So that is my message for you guys today. I hope it helps. I hope that people can take away from this to stop avoiding and start taking accountability. I know that I'm really trying to do that in my life. It just makes me feel more clear. It makes me feel more level-headed. It makes me feel more free. And it really leaves space for the great things to come into my life. And you will be amazed at how fast it starts happening the minute you start creating that space. So I love you guys. I hope that this message helped you, helps you, that you can refer back to it just to remember, make your list for the accountability and the avoidance.

avoidance, accountability, and start shifting things over to the accountability side. And I promise you, your big dreams will start to come to fruition sooner than you ever knew was possible. So have a wonderful weekend. I can't wait to see you guys back here next week, same time, same place right here on the Cadre app. Love you. Cheers.