Tales Of Leadership. Feedback W/Emotional Intelligence

Here we are, everybody. Tales of leadership. I can't wait. So I get jacked for. I'm just going to give it about 10 seconds here real quick. I hope everyone's having a great day. Carrie, your live today was outstanding. Gosh, that 15 to 20 minutes, I was just soaking it all in. It was tremendous information. So have to go a little bit earlier today. It is what it is. Sometimes schedules and everything just work out the way they work out. What I want to share today on tales of leadership is feedback with emotional intelligence and feedback without.

And I'm going to give you two examples. Okay. So I'm going to give you two different examples of feedback with emotional intelligence and without. All right, so let's start with without. I'm going to send an email, maybe even a text message, seven at night, whatever, to an employee or subordinate, and I'm going to share this message. m. That's it. m.. m. m. Maybe you're even right at 01:00 you haven't seen him before the rest of the day. None of those things happen at 01:00 you then meet with the individual and you jump right in.

Right? Say, I just want to let you know that last week I noticed this situation and how you showed up wasn't the best and I'm concerned that this might be a trend and blah, blah, blah. So again, the message was just crisp to 01:00. You start in with the feedback. You start in with the feedback right away. And then last but not least, as you end with this kind of conclusion, statement like, so what do you think? Right? So, you know, again, you know, literally sending a message to the employee, text message or email next meeting with the individual and jumping right into it.

Just saying, I'd like to talk to you about last week, situation that happened last week. And then last but not least is, you know, let's, let's just make sure this doesn't happen again. Right? Feedback loop, train number one. Now we're going to go feedback loop, train number two. And this feedback loop is going to be with emotional intelligence. Okay. And really what you're going to find is it's just being kind. Right. So number one, not at 08:00 you're not going to send a message at eight either.

Going to send it before the end of the day or first thing in the morning. That's just along the lines of employee a. Really looking forward to connecting with you. There's a situation that happened that I just want to touch base of to clarify and make sure that we're on the same page. Awesome. You're open. You're honest. You're letting them know that there is a little bit of a situation. There shouldn't be any anxiety versus 01:00. Number two, you're letting them know you're giving them a little bit of an idea of why you're asking to meet, why you're asking to connect.

Number two, when that individual then agrees to meet at set time. So let's say it's still 01:00 so you sit down together. Number one, hopefully there's pleasantries. And then you want to start by saying, you know, something along the lines of, say, I just want to touch base. Number one, there was an uncharacteristic thing that happened that I noticed last week. This just wasn't like you. Is everything okay? Just, number one, just start by asking them, are they okay? Right. Say there's this uncharacteristic thing that I saw that I noticed.

It just doesn't seem like you like, number one, are you okay? Are you your best self? Is there something I need to be aware of? Because the most important thing to me is that you're all right. So you start there, get their feedback. You never know. They might be dealing with some situations. You might be acting as a quasi psychologist therapist for a little bit, just listening and taking it in. You're not actually a therapist or a psychologist, but you're just listening and you're there for the employee.

And then last but not least is, you know, the most important thing for us is, you know, your job satisfaction, your security, and everything is okay. So I just want to make sure that we can cover this topic together. Please stop me at any time if something doesn't clarify or doesn't qualify with what we're talking about, because I just want to make sure that you and I are lockstep as we continue to move through this conversation together. Right. So again, making sure you ease the individual from a conversation perspective.

Number one, letting them know what it's going to look like. Number two, in the conversation before it even starts. Are you okay? Lean into that personal relationship. Right. Next. Next. What is very, very, very important is through this feedback train is leaning in even deeper to the understanding that they know what you're talking about. Like, does this make sense? Are you in agreement with what I'm saying, do you kind of feel what I'm talking about? Do you see how this could become an issue? Is this a trend, a mirage?

Type of questions? And last but not least, is this then end with, is there anything that I can do to help you? Is there anything I can do to support you? Is there anything that I can do to free up some time to make sure that we're on the same page? Right. So two very different ways to give feedback to the same individual. One without emotional intelligence, one with. Right. So I hope. I hope that when you're listening today and you have an opportunity to talk to employees soon, that you lean into the emotional intelligence side of things and just to understand, like caring, kindness, love, and support should be elementary.

As a leader, that's novice. Like, that's. That's baseline. Like, those things should exist right away, and you got to lean into those when you're working with your team and with your people, and you got to lean into them in every single way. How you communicate via the text message versus the email, what time, how it opens up, maybe their fear of anxiety or lack thereof. Number two, how you connect before the meeting and then how you connect at the meeting. And the most important thing is this. When you end.

When you end this conversation and you end this with this employee and this with this teammate, you should always try to get to a place of, are we on the same page? Are we on the same page? And does that person know they're supported, cared for, loved? All those words that actually matter with emotional intelligence. Okay. But remember, feedback can go up, feedback can go down. So just how you may be on the chart are reporting to somebody. Right. You should absolutely be doing the exact same thing with feedback.

Sometimes I feel like feedback always is viewed as a top down mentality. Change the game, change the narrative at your organizations. Use that from a bottom up approach, too. Bottom up is all relative. It's just titles and ranks. But at the end of the day, everybody is just as important. So, junk food junkie. Unbelievable. That is absolutely right on. Great afternoon. Good afternoon, Amy. I hope you're doing well. Abby. I love this. Luke, such good advice. I hope that you guys can all take this information and just continue to be better leaders, better people, better teammates, better lovers, better relationship, individuals.

Most importantly, better employees, better colleagues, better teammates. Right. Junk food junkie. Wording is important because the individual could think I'm losing my job. Exactly. Exactly. How you word things, how you communicate, and what it looks like. We can get into performance improvement plans, some other time. But for now, I just want to make sure that everyone understands feedback with feedback without hope. That makes sense. Hope you guys had a great day from this. Weeks of tales of leadership.

I'm out. Bye.