If My Plate Could Talk: “Experiencing and Expressing Joy”

Kaidro sphere is Friday, and on Friday we get together and talk all about if your play could talk, what would it say? Welcome to another opportunity for us to join in, to be together, to encourage one another and be real. That's one thing that you will always get from me, is if we're in this space together, we're going to be real. What's up? Beth Schofield. As you come in, say hello, say good morning, good afternoon, good evening. Depending upon when you listen to this, let me know where you are in the world.

South Jersey is coming in strong already representing. This is our collective way just to remind ourselves. Hello, honey. Hello, Leslie. That we are not alone. That's what I love about every time you put in your city. It reminds us that all across the world, we're joining together. Hello, Charleston. Hearing the same message. I'd also love for you to rate your week. I usually do that on a Wednesday or a Friday, depending upon if you're with me. So, one, meaning it's been rough. Hello, Fayetteville, North Carolina.

Hello, Georgia. Ten, meaning you've had an absolutely fabulous week. Hello, Sophia and Audrey. Michigan. What is up? I haven't been to Michigan in years. I need to go back. I need to work my way specifically to Detroit. But that being said, rate your week. Tell us where you are and what's your win for the week. I'm all about making sure that we're kind of accessing that mind. And it goes so well with what we're going to talk about. Hello, Irmo, South Carolina. We are going to focus today on experiencing and expressing joy.

You know, we go through life and we do things. And on a general basis, we can just go through the motions of things, which, there's nothing wrong with that. We need routine, we need rhythm. Hello, speak. Wonder. But there can also be an aspect of us that if we stop and take a look, we realize how much do we really allow ourselves to continuously experience joy? And while that's important or why that is important. Hello, Pa. Is that joy is an antidote for a low mood state. Joy is an antidote for tough seasons.

Joy is a foundation, foundational expression that helps us keep balance. So a lot of times we think about what's on your plate. And if we think about this in terms of food, we're always working towards, oh, it's great to have a balance plate. And in order to maintain a level of balance physically, mentally, socially, emotionally. Now, moving it from food to metaphorically, we want joy to be in the mixed. I want you to even think about that. I'm going to go back and forth in between the two for a moment.

If you create a plate and that plate has everything you don't like on it, how are you going to feel about that? You're going to feel like you're being punished. You're going to feel like this is awful. You're going to feel like, I am not enjoying this. This is punishment and you're not going to want to eat it. And if you do eat it, you're going to eat it and then you're going to go eat something else that brings you joy. The same thing happens in our regular life. If we are pouring out and giving to other people and doing all the things that we need to do, which is great, but we're not taking time to both express joy and experience joy in enough proportion, we'll still feel overextended.

We'll still feel like all of these amazing things are happening. But why do I not feel joyous? Or you have so much on your plate that you're like, I'm too tired to have joy. So I want you to consider that first question I want you to ask yourself is how much joy am I currently experiencing in life? You can always answer that question in the chat. I love the interaction and engagement. I'm reading what you're writing as it comes in. I love seeing those of you that are raiding your week, those that have worked out, those that are in a healthier headspace, stacking habits, all the things.

But how is my current level of joy right now? And part of that's also going to depend on how you define joy. I love word etymology. Here's one definition that I found that I feel like will really help encompass what we want to focus on. Joy is a state of in tunement. In. You've heard me talk about attunement and being aware in tunement. It's an internal dynamic, a feeling of expansiveness and deep appreciation. Let me stop here and say there are things that we do that bring us joy. But a true state of being, of joy, is in internal.

It is something that we are in tune to that we access. And why that's so powerful is when you see joy as an internal state, that means when life is hard and when life is difficult and things don't make you happy, you can still have joy. Did you realize that? Did you know that? Did you know that you cannot be happy and still experience joy? Yes. It is not to be confused with happiness. Happiness is often in connection with are things going well? Do I look the way I want to look? Did I have the perfect week with how I want to do my body?

Is everything happening according to plan? And that can shift and change, but that in tunement, in turnal state of joy can be experienced and expressed at any moment that you decide to reach down and tap into it. So it is one of the most powerful things that you want to make sure that you are cultivating. Joy is a natural state of living with your eyes fully open. I want you to think about that before I share what that means. What are your thoughts on that statement? It's a state of living with your eyes fully open.

I'm going to pause for a moment if you want to share in the chat what you think of when you consider your eyes are fully open. Yeah, we can experience joy even while grieving. Both can coexist. We can have opposing emotions that coexist. And yeah, happiness is fleeting. Joy is internal. When you're living with your eyes fully open, that means you're not focused on hard. That means you're not just focused on what needs to be fixed, what needs to be done. Marking off your to do list, making everyone happy.

It means there's an expansiveness that exists in your life that you see beyond the mundane. It means that you've learned how to treasure joy, that you've learned how to experience it. Because it is something you have to give yourself permission to experience. It is something that you have to learn to express, and it's something that you have to carefully guard. Yes, t boys, things may be chaotic around you, but you can maintain your joy because you're alive and you know that you're going to succeed because that's who you are.

That's who God made you. You can notice that there's more happening in life than what you're going through right now. Somebody might need to hear that there is more happening in life that is good, that is felt, that is peace beyond your right now situation. Because sometimes we have moments where there's something right in front of us, where that grief is right in front of us, where that situation, that loss, that separation, that transition, that disappointment, that mistrust is right in front of us.

And if that's all we see, our eyes are not fully open and it will steal our joy. And today's the day that if you want more joy, I want to remind you that it's there and it will help you with all of the other situations that you're carrying. Because joy can be sabotaged if we mistrust it. And it was interesting how even my thought behind this came. I reconnected with someone that I knew from childhood. And there's something about reconnecting with a good relationship from childhood that reminds you of some things that you used to be.

And so in my kind of brief conversation with this person and them saying things like, oh, you're still the same here, and this is different here. But it just made me realize that there are some joyful parts of who I am that I don't express to the same degree and on the same consistency as I once did. It's there. But I was like, wait a minute, I'm kind of saving that until. Have you ever done that? You are one way in your regular life, and then you get on vacation, and you're expressive and open and do all of these things that you don't allow yourself to do on a regular basis.

I want to challenge you to really look for those bursts of joy to internally in tune to them. Yes, Audrey. So that we can see that there really is more good than evil in the world. It's just that evil is what spends, evil is what gets our attention, and joy is also what allows us to stay calm in the midst of chaos. And life right now has some chaos, even if it's not chaos in your life. Our world is in chaos. But Joy says, I can, in tune, still feel expansive peace and appreciation. Even while there's uncertainty, even while there's unknown, even while there's problems that I don't know how to solve.

I'll work through those with other ways. But joy is still there to be experienced. Second question I want you to ask yourself, where are you limiting or denying yourself joy? That could be in any area. It could be in your relationship with movement. It could be in your relationship with certain people that you have relationships, but you only let them in so far. It could be in your relationship with food. Somewhere along the way, maybe you've received the message that being strong and healthy means that you have to eat in a way that doesn't bring you joy.

You want to eat in a way that nourishes your soul, but it also needs to bring you joy. That's why God gave us taste buds. He actually wants us to enjoy our food. Because when you're approaching something that you feel like does not bring you joy, that activates the pain center of your brain and makes you want to do opposite. That's when we self sabotage. That's when we resist. So joy is also quite a part of the recipe of consistency. When we enjoy something, we will do it more. We will do it again.

Of course, I'm going to take a moment because I haven't done it in a little while and talk about the neuroscience of joy. I'll only stay there for a minute, but I want you just to consider this, because it is so powerful that when you are experiencing joy, when you're tapped into that internal state, your brain activates the pleasure center of your brain, which then goes through your central nervous system, which is central throughout your entire body. And that's carried by four neurotransmitters that I'm going to give you.

Some of these will be familiar to those of you who've been in connection with me before. The first one is dopamine, that happy neurotransmitter. Here's the thing to remember about dopamine. Dopamine is a quick burst, so you feel it in the moment. But what you want to get to is the other neurotransmitter, serotonin, which is also centered around pleasure but longer lasting. Let me also add that when you experience joy and the brain activates and it increases your level of serotonin, that improves your mood states.

If you are someone under the sound of my voice who deals with anxiety, who deals with overwhelm, who deals with depression, who struggles with inconsistent mood states or feeling low, if you're grieving, joy creates powerful serotonin that will help lift you. And our only goal is to experience and express joy in ways that is not harmful to us. Joy is not bad, but it does hold consequence if we work or attempt to create joy in ways that end up being harmful. Third neurotransmitter is endorphins. Our body's natural opiates.

Joy, brain activation, central nervous system endorphins relieves pain, relieves stress, relieves pressure. So if you are experiencing pain and have physical ailments that you feel like, man, this is not budging. The more joy you get, the more your body releases that natural opiate to help release and unlock those tight spots and areas. Funny story that I just thought of. Many of you have watched me nurse frozen shoulder, you know, largely getting older and hormones, but also carrying the way of the world on my shoulders.

Stress. Yes, I did a little massage and acupuncture and physical therapy moves. But you want to know when I started really seeing this movement and freedom come back? When I pulled back and I tuned in to joy and I sought out experiencing it and expressing it to the people in my life, my body began to release and flow, and those tight spots that like to lock up on this right side of my personal body started to let me go because that's what it needed. And that was such a powerful reminder to me. Fourth neurotransmitter that is released when we experience joy is oxytocin.

Oxytocin is a love hormone. It induces positive feelings. So when you have joy, it starts with that really short release, dopamine, and then goes through serotonin, it goes through endorphins, goes through oxytocin, which are those longer lasting aspects you were designed and created to experience and express joy. But you have to give yourself permission to do so. So if you're the kind of person that feels like joy is not allowed. I'm afraid of joy. We can actually be fearful of joy depending upon what we were taught about it.

We see sometimes people who take joyous to recklessness, and then we think, well, I don't want to be reckless, so let me hold everything tight. Some of us may have just grown up in experiences or situations where joy was not modeled for us. Or maybe you're in a situation where you are battling grief right now, and there's a part of you that feels like, is it wrong for me to also experience joy when I'm going through this really hard time? It's nothing. Joy is something that you can have and that you can access and that is powerful and helpful to you at any season of your life.

Action step I want you to create a circle of joy. So I literally want you to get a sheet of paper. You can either do it now or really do it later. So you can look into it and create the biggest circle you can on that piece of paper. Fill the circle with the names of people, of events, of situations, whatever it is, experiences that are currently a source of joy for you. Right? Those in one color, then in another color. I want you to write people, places, and events that used to bring you joy, or that you would like to bring into your life as a part of expressing joy that maybe you're not doing yet.

So one color is what already exists that is a part of joy for you, and experiencing and expressing joy. But another color is, here are some of the things that you've done in the past or that you want to do in the future that you feel like would also add to your experience and your expression of joy. So, step one is that answering those questions, reflection questions, creating that circle of joy. And I encourage you, put it somewhere in front of you, we need to see joy in front of us. Sometimes.

We need to see it physically represented and then to bring it home. Because this is still about. If your plate could talk, what would it say? As you are deciding what's on your plate, whether that's food, mood, or life? A really powerful way that you can pull this into your personal awareness is to ask yourself, can I add anything else to my plate and still experience and express joy? Is what I'm about to put on my plate going to add to the level of joy that I want to experience, or will it take away from my ability and my capacity to engage in joy?

Because there are a few things, and I'll wrap up with this, that steal our joy if we let it. Being too busy, being too tired, being too overwhelmed. Those are three things that will steal our joy and four, being too in need by others. Those are four things that if we're not careful, they take away our capacity to experience and express joy because we're so exhausted or so spent being what everyone else needs, that joy literally can feel like something else to do. Like, oh, I'm too exhausted to go do that thing that brings you joy.

That is a sign that your mental well being is going in the wrong direction. When you stop doing the things that bring you you joy, you are heading in the wrong direction. So my challenge to you is to reflect on what it means to experience and express joy in your life. What does that current level of joy look like right now? Create your circle of joy and look at the difference between what exists and what is already there and what you would like to be there. Even if you don't think what you would like to be there is possible, still allow yourself to dream and envision that, and then, of course, take action.

Some of those things that you wrote down that you're like, I want to experience, this used to bring me joy. I used to be in tune with myself this way. S***** it back, because that joy is going to be the fuel. It's going to be part of the motivation, it's going to be part of the consistency and the well being that you desire, and it will make a world of difference in your life. I say this all the time and I will not stop. Knowledge is not power without application. So don't just hear this message about joy without doing anything to actually participate in it.

I want you to participate in your life. I want you to stop worrying about trying to make everyone else happy and work on connecting to the internal state of joy that is in you. And that is yours for the taking. Until we meet again. Be fabulous, be great. Believe in your ability to love and to experience life. To live well, to love well and to play well. And I will see you next week. Have a good one.