A Saturday talk that defines enoughness and guides listeners through its four calibrating arms—words, feelings, thoughts and action—showing how affirming present worth shifts focus from what one does to who one is.
It is what, July 12th. It's flying by, y'all. I hope you are well. I really do hope you're great. And, you know, I'm glad I'm here.
On Saturdays, we often talk about how we can work on the things that make us who we are. What is enoughness? It's the practice of affirming that you are already indeed, in this moment, capable of doing something that has worth.
Older generations often put a lot of their worth within what they know. When you think your worth is attached to those things, that's when we start to run into some pretty vicious cycles. Your worth is not attached to the things you don't attached to your output.
Well, hey there, Cadre. How are we doing today? I hope you are well. I really do hope you're great. And, you know, I'm glad I'm here. I'm glad you're here. I know what I know, and I care about you. It is what, July 12th. It's flying by, y'. All. I don't know what I mean by it, but whatever it is, it definitely seems like it's flying by. It's Saturday here in the Cadre sphere Amar. And on Saturdays. Mary, nice to see you. Saturdays, we often talk about how we can work on the things that make us who we are.
That's sort of how I kind of like to look at personal development. You know, often throughout the Monday through Friday, we focus a lot on what we do. And all of a sudden, we get an exhale as we move into what the world is set up as the weekend, and we go, huh, you know, I don't have to do. Brittany, how you doing, my friend? Nice to see you. Monday through Friday, we focus so much on the. What we do. We can look at that as the professional development. And all of a sudden, naturally, in the cadence of the western schedule of the weekend, we go, ha.
Take a little bit of time to not focus on what we do, but on who we are. And that's why on Saturdays, I talk about my concept of enoughness. What is enoughness? It's the practice of affirming that you are already indeed, in this moment, capable of doing something that has worth. You may go say that a different way. Okay, here's how the world, most of the time, guides us. We're this good. The world says, once you're this good, then you will have worth. What ends up happening is we always keep chasing that place where we will be good enough if.
Or we will be good enough when. And enoughness says no, actually, right now, you are capable of doing something that's pretty rad, that's pretty progressive, that can make you go, oh, yeah, that's. That's right. I do have worth at all times. We look from kind of a sport analogy. Everything in sport is getting to ready position first. So if you think about the greatest athletes, it's the Wimbledon finals this weekend. The people who are going to win are not the people who are the strongest, fastest, hardest, deepest, best tennis players, but the people who go, in this moment.
Here's my opportunity, Brittany, going, you know, right now, here's what I can do. That is where we find fruit and freshness and progression and joy and enlightenment and the reminder that there's something to do in each moment in which we live. And that something may be passive or forward, it may be loud, it may be soft. Wherever you are, that's where we settle in, in this enoughness conversation. Enoughness has four kind of calibrating arms. The first one is my words are enough. That is your honesty, and there's things we work on there.
The second one is your feelings are enough. That's your intuition, the part of your being that says, ooh, do that. That makes sense and will feel good. The third is your thoughts are enough. That's your curiosity. Those are your wonder muscles. And then lastly, I am enough. And that is your presence. And within that present state, I'm going to share a little morsel here today, especially in older generations. And again, I'm going to leave it that vague because generational lines are always blurred.
You know, I'm an old millennial, but I'm the youngest of seven, so I kind of grew up a Gen Xer, but also I've worked with young people my whole life, so I'm kind of a, a Gen Z or sometimes. So lines are blurry. So when I say the older generations, I'm generalizing on purpose. Older generations often put a lot of their worth within what they know. That if they know an answer or if they know a perspective, that is where they go, now I'm going to be confident now. I'm going to exercise my brightness and my personality because I know knowing stuff is cool, being able to do stuff is cool, having talents, having skill sets, having capabilities is really, really cool and wonderful.
But when you think your worth is attached to those things, that's when we start to run into some pretty vicious cycles. I look at people who will hold on to untruths because even though it may be an untruth, it is something that they can hold on to and say, this is my worth. So they will walk down the pathway of defending something that they don't want to defend. Because in reality, what they're saying is, I'm not defending the thing, I'm defending my worth. Here's a movement example. There's so many times I've sat across the table from a student of mine within, like the exercise wellness space, and this person, on average is somewhere between 40 and 60 years old.
They were in better shape in a younger chapter of life, and all of a sudden they were in a quote, quote, less great shape sometime in the middle. And now they're quote, quote, getting in better shape again. And Finding their groove. And here's what happens. Let's go and say they go to an exercise class regularly and they start getting praised for getting good. At this exercise class, they get faster, stronger, harder, deeper. Go, go, go. And they go, yeah. They see my worth. In reality, that worth is being attached to the thing that they're accomplishing.
All of a sudden their body starts hurting, their knee hurts, their hip hurts, their shoulder hurts, something hurts. And they go, shake it off. I'm gonna keep going. I'm never gonna miss a Monday. I'm gonna be 1% better. 1. Go, go, go. Their body keeps going, hey, no, this hurts. We're not well. Something small is getting bigger. But they don't listen because their worth is attached to the thing that they're doing. And sooner or later, every single time, this person gets hurt, like hurt to a place that they need to stop doing the thing and what ends up happening, they spiral towards a place of losing their worth.
Because their worth was attached to the thing that they their identity of being the stronger, harder, faster, deeper. The knower, the goer was falling away in their mind and in actuality. Because in their mind it's true. They lost who they were and they lost their worth. They were no longer enough. It is always disheartening and humbling to see a grown person breaking down in front of you because they're going, I losing who I am. I'm losing my value because I can't do the push up. Because I don't know the answer to the question.
Because I don't know how to use the new technology. Because all of a sudden the thing that was true yesterday that everybody thought that I was the expert on is no longer true. Your worth is not attached to the things you do not attached to your output on a Monday or a Tuesday. You're closing your rings on a Wednesday. And that does not lower the value of closing your rings on a Wednesday. But these two things exist interdependently. I'll share. I ran my 40th marathon, April of 2024 Boston Marathon, last world major.
I was the, I think the 90th Minnesotan to do all six world majors. As a non athletic kid, as the non verbal kid, as the hyper emotional kid, as the little queer kid whose best friends the piano to go and be like, yeah, I'm a 40 time marathon, but I did it my way. Pretty cool. And guess what? Since April of 2024, I have not ran one mile because my body has been in a circling chapter of chronic stuff. I have surgery again on Wednesday. Guess what? I can miss the thing that I was doing. And I do. I'm in Rochester, Minnesota right now.
I ran the Rochester Marathon in 2007, and as I was walking around, I was like, oh, I remember running here 18 years ago. And I can miss that and still remember that my worth was not coming from the thing that I was doing. And it's not an easy thing to separate those two things. I can miss and mourn and go gah. Last words I'll say today is enoughness most often doesn't feel like it. I'll say it again. Enoughness most often doesn't feel like it. Enoughness being where you are with what you have and knowing that there is worth and capacity in that thing that you're doing most often will not feel like this is nourishing and sustainable and I'm satiated and enough.
And yet that's the reason we come here. That's why we hang out in the Cadre sphere and get these little reminders. As Brittany says here, I needed this. Five exclamation points and then capital letters. Like the way we express Amari, your consistency in sharing to the world and looking at how do we do? Where do we do? What do we do? And being in this space, you're doing the thing. Be nourished by it. Even though you may go, am I on the right track? You're on the right track, baby. I'll see you tomorrow.
Have a good one.
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