Comedy Through the Chaos:Parenting Edition Savoring the Delay

Foreign Happy Saturday to you here in the Cadre sphere. I am Ms. Shannon and I hope that the day is treating you well so far. If it is not, shame on it. Not shame on you. I am a variety of things like a comedian and a corporate speaker and a voice actor. Hello, Andy. I wondered if you'd be here today. Good to see your name in the chat. A variety of things. Hello, Mr. Rick Meyer. Good to see you as well. Jules, always good to see you here. Amar, good to see you as well. Thanks for joining everybody.

Good to see you. As I said, I hope that Saturday is treating you well so far. It is a stormy day here in the Twin Cities. Hello sunshine. I will take that moniker because the day is not providing it, at least not at this point of the day. Right now, right now we are going through a lot of storms here in the Twin Cities and so my kiddo has elected to use that as a time to restart his day. Which is fair. Which is fair. So thank you for joining me for the comedy through the Chaos parenting edition this Saturday morning.

I hope that things are treating you well. I hope that if the day is complex already that you have lots of time to unspool it for the rest of the day. I just like to remind myself if I have those parts of the morning that are complicated, that that doesn't mean I'm having a bad that was a bad moment as a complicated bad moment. But it doesn't mean that the whole day have to go, has to go that whole direction. So if you are accustomed to popping through the Cadre sphere, you know that lately a lot of our contributors, we like to follow a theme.

They'll give us a little homework assignment for a month. Sun and blue skies up north. Ah, good for you. Go and enjoy that. I have a friend that's here in the Twin Cities part of Minnesota who is getting ready for a marathon and she said it was very steamy for she was at where she was going to be running. So thank you very much for sharing that where you have soak in some rays for the rest of us. So it's been a complicated summer here. I think that that's just a good segue into what a lot of us are covering.

Hello, Speak Wonder. Hello. Hope that Pennsylvania is treating you well. It's kind of stormy in the Twin Cities part of Minnesota. I think it's interesting when we were looking through the concept of savor and for me it just gave me the opportunity to think about some of the things that I have learned to savor as a parent and by that not just moments that came because I am a parent, but things that I have learned throughout this parenting journey. So. Oh, four year old granddaughter. Oh good and a wonderful name, Matilda.

Have fun. I think it's really interesting, as I've mentioned before, if you see me, I've talked about how I am a recovering type A person. I don't even call it type anymore type A anymore. I call it high functioning anxiety, which helped me really name what it is that I do. And that has not necessarily been going away. It's just something that I've chose, chosen to manage differently and to relate to differently than before. And a lot of that realization came after I had my son. And and it's so interesting because I've learned things from him directly.

I've also learned things parenting him and I've learned things especially because of our journey where he is on the autism spectrum with being high supports. And so that means that there are a lot of supports and therapies that we go through often. And so I learned things from his behavioral therapist a lot too. And one of the things I had to learn about myself is I and as I go into the topic that I thought would be interesting for us to noodle on today, the concept of savoring this, the delay and maybe you're like me that having things get in the way of your schedule and your plan used to really p*** you off, just throw you into an anxiety spare spiral where you're like why does the universe not understand that I got someplace to be?

And any of those things where you're like, I plan to be there by this time but there is some sort of delay, something stopping me from getting to my destination, from getting to the project, from getting to the plan, from getting through the plan and getting something done. I was sure I was going to be able to do this by X time. And so that has been an interesting, interesting journey for me personally is that ability to go, yes, that was where you were then. This is what is actually going to happen now.

How can you be present? And this is the reason why I'm glad that you're here. Andy is. I think that you'll like this comment because for me, what I have been working on most recently is is my mindfulness journey. And I'm just a. It's a process. It's a work in process. So I am a world class multitasker and I'm always doing multiple things all at one time. It's just kind of how I'm Wired like, it's very difficult for me to sit still and do one thing. I'm always doing something else. So for me, even getting to the point of my mindfulness practice that I can be fully mindful doing one thing, not even sitting down and meditating for a long period of time, just going, you're only going to work on this one thing to its completion.

That has been a difficult challenge for me. And being able to savor the delay has helped me do that. Because sometimes the universe says, you don't have a choice. We're not doing this right now. We're going to do something else. And one of the, I think the, the, the biggest examples of that is I, you know, whenever they're in my area, there are lots of opportunities to get stuck at a railroad crossing where you're on your way to someplace you're sure you're going to be on time. And then you see those railroad crossing signs coming down and telling you that you got to stop and sit in a line and wait to see how many cars go by, just freaking out, deciding, hey, should I have turned around sooner?

Was there an alternate route that I should have taken? Because now I'm sitting here, there's no motion, and I can't move. And that used to be the way that I'd feel about it, and now I have the beautiful, adorable, high supports, autistic kiddo that I have. And he loves trains. He's loved trains since I can remember him first loving a thing, a thing, a thing that was not his mom. One of the first things he loved was trains. We have hundreds of trains downstairs that we have accumulated over the last decade.

And I mean, Thomas trains, Chuggington trains, narrow gauge trains, O gauge trains, all these different trains. Trains. Because it kind of depends on where he's at in his cycle. And he still plays with them. He doesn't play with every single one of them, but trust me, he has a mental catalog of the hundreds of trains that he has downstairs in our basement living room. And so I remember years ago, the first time that we got stuck at a railroad crossing and he was in the car with me, how he had this amazing sense of wonder and interest in all of these trains and didn't see it as a delay because he doesn't run on a schedule like the rest of us do.

I'm the one that's going, we were supposed to be at a place by a certain amount of time. He's like, oh, we're going to a place. Hopefully we get there soon. Before I use all patience being in this car. But he's not looking at the clock and he's not looking at the calendar. So as long as something else interesting that he can be mindful of or something that will capture his attention is happening, he's cool. He's cool. And so I had to learn to be more like that. So the first time I noticed that he really was interested in the train while we were there, and I was like, oh, hey, buddy.

And then we could sit there and look at the cars that he recognized because he'd seen him in some of the train videos that he likes to watch on YouTube, that we could actually practice our counting because we're counting the train. So instead of me counting the train from a position of how many more of these gosh darn cars are going by before I can actually go about my business, it was me going, oh, look, we get to actually, we got all the way up to 20. Let's start over and we'll just work on our 20s again.

And now we can just see how far can we count? And so that was years ago, the first time I noticed that he and I were able to have this little front row adventure when we were going to a railroad crossing. And now it's to the point that even when I'm in the car by myself, I'm happy about a railroad crossing. It's a time for me to sit there, put my car in park, and just wait, just watch, see if the cars go by, see how many I get to see, See if I recognize any of them from the videos that I've watched with him over and over and over again.

An opportunity to sit there and see, wow. Somebody took the time when this car wasn't moving to put some beautiful graffiti on it. And that's actually an amazing skill that they have. And I think that it's really beautiful. It's time to sit there. If nothing else, it's time for me to sit there and go, well, I might as well sit here and be mindful of this moment, because the universe didn't give me another option. So I could sit there and use that time to be upset about the delay I have in my life.

Or I can choose to go, I guess, somewhere, some way out there, God, the universe and spirit set up this delay. So you take a minute to breathe and you can't do anything else, because if you do it, then you'll end up messing something up. I'm not going to be one of those people that gets out of the Car, walking around the car in a huff. Clearly, that means that you need to work on some things. I think. So I appreciate. All right. I encourage you to look through your life and see where there are some moments that might be baked in where you can savor the delays that you have in your life.

Maybe it's something as tangible as a crossroad. You get. Yeah, you get to sit still. You know, it is. It's one of the few times that I do. I don't have to multitask. But I did another thing that I appreciate being able to share because sometimes it's a delay in your day in the process that you are going to do. So, for instance, yesterday I needed to get something done. I needed to get a script off to one of my client partners. And I know that they're waiting on it. And so. But my kiddo had a rough morning.

He had a rough morning and he was just not feeling it. And it took a minute and I wasn't able to sit there and work on the script. And so after we got through the rough patch of the morning, he got his act together and then decided he was going to do that teenager, middle of the nap, middle of the day nap thing. And normally I'm upset that he's napping while I'm working because that means that he's going to go to bed later. So that means that I've extended my day now. But I've also gotten to the point now that I'm going, you know what that delay in us being able to go to what I think the bedtime is the routine that I want us to have in the middle of the evening.

I mean, in the evening, towards the middle of the night, sometimes that gets pushed, too. And that's okay, because as long as I have a happy kid at different spots during the day, that particular delayed gratification of. Yeah, I know that I said I was going to start having us wind down at 10pm but it's not going to work today. That's all right, too. And so I was able to again, savor that delay from that time, sit down in peace with my cup of tea, finish my script, get it off, get some things together, not feel guilty that I was working while he was awake or any of those things.

So, again, God, the universe and spirits added this delay into the day from what I thought we were going to be doing to provide me with the actual ability to be still in what it was that I was working on. So maybe you have some moments like that, maybe there's something that comes up and it looks like a speed bump in your day. And the first thing, your first reflex response is, get crappy. The first thing you're like, this is in my way. And so maybe that delay was placed in your path for a reason.

Maybe it's a chance for you to, if not sit still, to breathe, to exhale, to go through your mental list of things that you're working on. Because maybe you were missing something because you were so busy rushing forward. Maybe that delay is what you actually needed to actually reset because you were allowing your adrenals to get way too caught up. You know, maybe especially as a parent, we get so in the, I gotta get them to hockey. I gotta get them here. I gotta do this. When am I gonna go to the grocery store?

Maybe those moments when you're having a long line in the checkout line, maybe that delay is, you know what? If nothing else, I'm just gonna sit here and I'm play a word puzzle on my phone while I'm in this line, because that's what I get to do right now. And if I did it later, maybe I'd feel guilty about it. But this delay is a moment for you to go ahead and go. Here's where I'm at today. I encourage you to look for those moments throughout your day, throughout the rest of the week. Speak wonder.

I hope that you have a beautiful time at your grandkiddos celebration. That sounds wonderful for everybody else. If you do not have a celebration baked into your day, make one. Make one for yourself. Maybe it's just because you made a really good at home latte and you want to do that. I'm going to make a matcha is what I'm gonna make. I'm gonna go make a matcha. It seems appropriate for the tone and timber of the day that we have here in the Twin Cities. Gonna go do that. I don't play Words with Friends.

I play this other one that's a match word game. I love that, you know, kind of thing. I'll have to. But maybe I will try Words with Friends. So mine is, it's a very match game. And so it's good for my vocabulary. That's what I trade. I teach myself into saying, all right. Trick myself into saying, it's not only a game I play on my phone, I is one. I'll have to send you some screenshots, so maybe you'll like it. So I already like all of you. Enjoy the rest of your day. If you're able, if the day is rough on you, we understand and we're here for those moments as well.

Feel free to look through the Cadre app. Let us know if there's anything that we are not covering. We always appreciate all of you. Appreciate you holding us accountable when we're doing something wild. Andy, I appreciated your picture of you and your pup on your adventure. I it never occurred to me to put a bike helmet on a pup. So if you guys have not seen that go through the app, go through the house. Oh, the train museum. Oh, you're near that. Oh, I haven't been to that one with my kiddo. I might add that to the agenda.

We need some more places to go that would be interesting and entertaining and not too far of a drive. For those of you who don't live in Minnesota, I live in the Twin Cities. My son used to really love the train museum and they have a train museum in Duluth, Minnesota, which is about three hours from me. And that drive has gotten cumbersome. He has not gotten road trip worthy lately. So looking for other things that are in town that would be great. So I am looking for other things to do that aren't just take him to the holiday station gas store.

We'll actually go on a holiday. So everyone feel free to pop through the app. There are so many different contributors that are in here, like Speak Wonder. You know, you can always find a message, hopefully that gives you whatever you need at the moment that you need it. We appreciate all of you being here again, always let me know if there's something that I should be working on. Fabulous. Thank you so much. I looked that up. I wasn't familiar with that, Andy. And that's what we are here. We are contributors and resources and a community.

And now more than ever, being able to find other people and build those communities is really important, everybody. So thank you for being here. Thank you for staying with us. Thank you for letting us know what we can do to make your days a little bit better 1% at a time. So I will see you guys on Thursday, 2pm Central for the standardized edition of Comedy through the Chaos. And in the meantime, I'm going go make sure that all my patio furniture didn't blow over last night in the thunderstorm. So I appreciate you all have good, be well.