Sober Not Somber Hour

Hey, y'. All. Welcome Sober Not Somber Hour coming to you live from Embrace north in the heart of the Marcy Homes area. I am seated in their employee area and I'm right on top of an amazing sauna. Like, the sauna heat, it feels so, like, warm and comforting up here. And you can tell just getting out of the sauna and cold immersion. Got rosy cheeks. So good for hydration. And yeah, I. I don't know, it's kind of fun to like, not be at my desk at home where I usually come at you from. And yeah, my name is Jen Ve and I'm the host of Sober Not Somber Hour where we talk about all things alcohol free lifestyle, sober, celebrated lifestyle, and usually I highlight an na Bev.

Today I. I'm gonna highlight water. I meant the sauna, so it makes sense. And I love to be sipping a sauna water. Although I forgot. Hi, Luke. I missed you at the sauna. Yes, all green, all green. In the spirit of Christmas, I guess I just need, like green nails now. But yeah, so I'm sitting up here and I'm on top of like all of their three saunas here below me on the first floor. And it's just warm and cozy. So, yeah, let's get into it today. The topic for the month of December in the Cadre sphere is reflection.

And I love, love, love this topic. In fact, I built my marketing business on the idea of reflection. And that's called Spark Track. I founded it almost 14 years ago and it was built on the idea that no one pauses enough in marketing and life and what I created what it's what I call an event recap, my signature event recap. So I would go to all these events and there was all this knowledge sharing. This is like corporate events. And then after the event, people just like went about with their lives and work, not acknowledging that they maybe took an entire day at a conference to learn about something that really interested them.

But there was no reflection. There's no time for reflection. We all move so freaking fast that I just noticed that. And I think it's been part of my personality since day one. I am a person who likes to write and reflect. I do journals upon journals about travels. Luke and I have connected on this. But like, yeah, like, reflecting is really, really important. And we had this little window, I believe there was a little window in November. I felt to take time to reflect. I went on two retreats for myself, and now there's just a little window before I feel like this weekend starts, like the holiday Craziness.

So what are you guys all reflecting on for this year, for this month? Like, what's something big that you are, you've looked back on your, your life could be over the last year and really have taken some time to reflect. And I'll bet the perspective of when you got through that thing, whatever that was, the culmination of it, now it would feel different if you went back and reflected on it. There's a ton of growth in there. When I went back and looked at things, so I'm going to give an example because this just, this just happened for me.

I was going through a bunch of files and paper that I had from our house. So I sold my house with my ex end of October and I came back to my apartment with boxes of things and in one box was the offer letter I got for this high paid corporate role that I accepted 14 some years ago. And I looked at, I read the letter and looked at the amount and I remember thinking at the time that it was such a crazy high amount that I wasn't worth, number one, wasn't worthy of it, number two, a huge uneasiness stepping into what was like a 30 pay raise from the job I was in prior.

And I knew it was going to be more stress. And actually, Luke, you and I talked about this on the podcast. Is that that year for me after I accepted this corporate role was the most devastating one in terms of anxiety and alcohol misuse. And I lasted about a year and the corporate burnout was real. So looking at that offer letter and looking at the dollar amount and where I was at in the remembering the way I felt like being really proud when I got that letter. I shared with my parents, like, oh my gosh, I've like made it.

I'm an associate at this firm, I have a designated parking spot, I have an impressive title. But something in me was like, I'm not well. And of course I had been misusing alcohol, you know, for 20 years. So I'm not sure why, you know, I would step into a role like that without being healthy. But at any rate, I again, I have 11 years of sobriety. So looking back to that point, like 13 years ago when I left that corporate role in that high paying job and all that has happened. So I was reflecting on the last 13, 14 years and what I got really caught up in was that that amount I was making what it was making 14 years ago, had I kept pace on the corporate ladder and kept going, how financially well off I would be, would I be well, so for a good day or so, I was like, sort of devastated by that number.

And then over the last, I would say yesterday and today, I had a meeting with one of my friends who was helping me figure out what my next living situation is going to be. And I really was like, you know what? I have gratitude for making time to get myself well. Like, I left that corporate job and I healed myself. I chose sobriety, and I needed to just be out of those spaces, out of the rat race, out of like the financial success, achievement, achievement model. And I needed to heal myself and I just needed to do that.

So I have gratitude for that. But also on the flip side, right, is reflecting on where would I be now had I chosen to get sober earlier and had a job offer like that that I could have actually still stepped into if I were well, and where would that be now? So it's like this spiral, right? And I keep just letting it play out in many different ways. And I'm just like, I'm sharing because I think there people don't go into reflection very deeply sometimes because it can be painful or it can be filled with, like, regret.

Regret and what ifs. So I think setting aside enough time to process something like that because all the emotions came up for me, you know, sadness, not being able to step into that role, having to leave because I needed to get well and get sober. And now looking at financially, I'm a little stressed daily because, you know, just through life changes. And so, like, being grateful for being able to stay in it, know that there is a purpose to my work and that it's evolving and I'm. I'm going to be ready for it in 2026.

And that's a reflection. That's a big reflection, folks. I mean, I hope you all have time to do that work because it's so important. It is really important. I just went on the creative morning stage last September and talked about the importance of reflection. And it's different than a pause. It's deeper and there's just a lot of exploration. And literally every emotion will potentially come up during that. So I'd encourage you this season before it gets too crazy to really reflect on the year. Hey, Quinn.

Luke, are you still here? While you're hanging with me, I'm like, I could go on and on about this topic, but here I am, I'm at a sauna and just feeling so grateful for the Cadre community. I'm headed to do guided sauna tonight, and it's going to be on the topic of reflection and mindful drinking. So reflecting on what kind of choices we're making, it comes to alcohol and you know what how his that served us or not. So doing it at a brewery at prize Brewery. I'm going to be there Tuesday nights. If you live in Minneapolis, 6:30-8, come over and see me and we'll do some guided sauna.

Signing off. Thanks to everyone who joined. Yeah, and we'll catch you next week. Ciao, ciao.