Cadre Today

At your house again, all we wanted friends. There's so much that I want to say but I gotta hug back. So scared how you react. I just had it all away. Good morning, Cadre. I got the words I love you. I thought that was a good line to go and start off. Cadre, today, today we love you, Cadre. We love that you're here. We love that you are doing your best and will always be that reminder that what you can do, what you got is probably going to change the world today in ways big and small, in ways you cannot imagine.

Ways for you and ways for others. Marisa, nice to see you on snowy Wednesday here where I am, up in the twin cities of Minneapolis and St. Paul, Minnesota. And I hope where you are, there's something going on in this world that you see that reminds you that it's an evolution. Everything is always changing. So the good times, enjoy them. The bad times, get ready because they're going to continue to evolve. I'm glad that I'm here. I'm glad that you're here. I know what I know and I care about you.

The song that played us in today is called Words by Alesso and Zara Larson. The title is what called me to it. Words are one of my favorite things and one of the things that give me the most headaches. Why? Because words don't mean anything outside of what we decide that they mean. I couldn't decide that a word means X and Marisa could decide that a word means why and who's right. It's the wrong question if we both believe that that word means something different. We're both right. We're both moving with that truth that here's what we're saying and here's what it means.

So whenever we try to share words, whenever we try to communicate together, it's important to go, well, what do we really mean? Today I want to talk about two empathy and compassion. Hi, Mel Myers. Empathy and compassion are the two words I want to talk about today. And hey, if you are in the Twin Cities or if you want to bop onto the interweb later on, I will be talking empathy and compassion on Twin Cities live on KSTP TV from 3 to 4:30 today. Empathy and compassion, they kind of sound like the same thing, right?

Oh, I want to be really empathetic. I want to be really compassionate, maybe even put sympathy into that same space. But they're different. And at various times, in various situations, you don't want to mix up which one you're using. I always Love telling the story that the Dalai Lama tells about this person walking down the street. As this person walks down the street, they see another person on the side of the road that has been the victim of an avalanche, right? A boulder is laying on top of this person.

And all of a sudden the man on the road goes, huh? The compassionate response would be to go, wow, that person looks like they have a boulder on top of them. I'm going to move the boulder off of them because I want to be compassionate versus empathy. The empathetic response would be to go, huh? Well, I can imagine what it feels like to have a boulder laying on top of me. I can feel what that feels like. And all of a sudden, the man falls down in a heap because he's feeling what the man who's under the boulder is feeling.

The empathetic response is to become debilitated because you're feeling what that other person is feeling. The compassionate response is to go, huh? I can imagine what they're feeling, and I don't want them to feel it anymore. I'm going to help them and move that boulder. How often do we mix up compassion and empathy, right? Sometimes someone who's in a big state of grief, we think that we need to do something, we need to take away their grief, which we know we can't do, but we always go, well, what can I do?

Well, what can I do? What can I do? And the person who's in grief is going, stop it. You can't. You can't. You can't take away what I'm feeling, but you can. The empathetic response. Sit next to them. You can listen to them. You can consider being in their space, knowing that there's value in not being in grief without people nearby. But let's go ahead and say someone is like, oh, my gosh, I have so many things on my plate today. Oh my gosh, I don't know how I'm going to get through everything. Oh my gosh.

Like, I just. I. I can't. I can't get a breath. I can't get my head above water. The empathetic response is like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, that sounds really hard. Okay, bye. Where in reality, the compassionate response to the person who's overworked, overloaded would be like, hey, let me pick up the kids after school, or, hey, let me drop off dinner. That would be the compassionate response in that situation. So today I invite you to consider compassion or empathy. They ain't the same thing. And actually using the wrong one in the wrong situation can create some headaches and can create some undesired results.

So no matter where you are today, consider compassion, empathy. Which one? Use it because people, they need you. Have a good one, y'. All. We will talk to you later. I got the words. I love you. Bye. As soon as they leave my mouth, you just.