Comedy Through The Chaos: Parenting Edition - RESTART

Hello. Maybe again, everybody, we'll see how this goes. I am doing a restart, which I think is really interesting based upon what our theme is for the month of January. I am Ms. Shannon and today is Saturday. If you're watching us live, if not, I hope that I get to see you in whatever part of the future you are in. And if you wonder why I'm laughing, It's because I'm Ms. Shannon. I'm doing comedy through the chaos. And we'll normally do this at 10:00am Central, which I thought that I did. Hello, Speak wonder.

I'll bring you up to speed. You'll like this story because I know you have some technical difficulties here in the Cadre sphere a couple of weeks ago. Hello, Shannon. Hopefully you could hear me okay and I look fine because this is my son's iPad versus my phone. Hello, junk food junkie. Good to see you. Hello, hello, Hello. So I went live at 10 and talked, I think placed in positions where we have to figure out what's going to work for us right now based upon all of the complexities of what we have going on in the universe right now.

And for me personally, and I appreciate what you were saying, Shannon, because what I wanted to talk about today was the concept of paying attention when anxiety is high. And I think that for many of us anxiety is at a fever pitch right now. I mean, for many of us to set an all time high, there are so many things that are going on when it's already complex as a parent and a caregiver. And now we're trying to make these decisions in the midst of all of this additional anxiety and trying to figure out how we can maintain our self regulation when the world is topsy turvy and trying to figure out how to do that often where we can figure out how to deal with our anxiety and not pollute our kids because they have their own anxiety as well.

And this has been a good week for me to remember some of those practices of how to kind of try and figure out how to do that. And for me, a lot of that is paying attention to what that's works. You know, okay, thank you very much. We'll fix the tech, it'll be fine. Yeah. So for me, that's paying attention to what works, not what works. When I force it, it's paying attention to what works because that helps me calm my anxiety down and it also gives me the ability to sit there and go, you know what?

You have options, there's other options so that we can figure these all out. Yeah. Ye. Yeah. Besides anxiety, we've become nervous now and it's difficult, I think for many of us. Whether you deal with a diagnosed version of anxiety or if you have an anxiety that pops up in your life. I'm one of those people that has high functioning anxiety. So when I manage it, it's fine. When I don't manage it, I end up in an emergency room, you know, kind of thing, having an anxiety attack just out of a position of self preservation for me and my son have really just actively worked on how can I manage my anxiety so that it comes out like I'm a tea kettle and little bursts versus trying to like harbor so much and carry so much and think that things are okay and I can deal with them later because that always works until it doesn't, at least in particular setting.

And so this week, like I said on paper, has ended up being a good week. There were a lot of things that I'm like, you know, I'm really glad I had to be got to be a part of that. I'm glad that this is since it's such a complex time, kind of a slow time for me, career and event wise, so that I don't have to make as many decisions about should I leave the house, is it going to be, you know, what's going to happen, you know, when I'm the person that's usually the one that is the bellwether that keeps everybody as calm as possible in our little living environment.

So it's, you know, me deciding when that's appropriate and when it's just good that I get to just stay close to home and keep things small. So I'm glad that I don't have to make as many of those decisions right now. A lot of my events right now are voiceover events or, or voiceover projects or virtual events. And I'm very, very grateful that that's what I get to do. One of the events that I had out of the house this week was one where I actually got to hang out with JC and some other like minded people that were working nonprofits.

And that was lovely and fueled my soul. And then I went to the grocery store and came home and hid out. Today I'm very grateful that I get to do, I consider very soothing, which is go through our laundry. I find it to be one of my best mindfulness practices. To sit here and wash laundry and fold clothes is one of my favorite. I know it sounds dumb. One of my favorite mindfulness practices is folding clothes, warm laundry Putting them away, being able to make space. I love it. That's a lot of what I'm going to do today after I go push some snow, which is why I'm in my weathers.

And the other thing that I did this week was something that was for both me and on behalf of my son. I've been putting off getting him a passport because you know, real talk since you guys know I have a adorable 17 year old who ties the ports on the autism spectrum. Now I go on the standing lines. A lot of people, neurotypical people are bad at it. And so it's something that I have just. Yeah, Shannon, I love doing me some laundry. It's a low pressure, low stakes thing that you get to feel the completionist in you just as a champion when it is done.

So I'm looking forward to that. But regarding this passport, you know, I was trying to look up ways and go, all right, what can I do to not have to take him to the, to the passport office? Okay, well that's not an option. I'm going to have to take him. What can I do to minimize our stress once we're at the passport office? Because I know that that could be a trigger for both him and me. Yeah, see, it's a good time for that. I, I thank you, junk food junkie. I feel validated. Thank you. I like it as well.

So you know, it was me using that variety of my type, type A slash high functioning anxiety and going what do to work through the process and what are the trigger points that might think is complicated for both of us. And so one of the things I thought might be the hardest is getting the passport photo. And you know, you know, I'm like, you know what, you got a studio, you can figure this out. Get the studio, you know, get the photo done at home at least make sure everything's filled out, set an appointment and then we'll worry about that, you know in a, a week or so we'll work on that.

So this around some of the other things we had going on. I was trying to figure out how to get him to take a passport photo. And I thought originally I was going to do it on Thursday. And so I'm like, come on, let's go take a photo. And for some reason he just wasn't feeling it. He didn't want to do it. And I'm like, okay, so I put it off and it's almost like magically he figured it out on Friday that we needed to do something because he got Up. Decided he's going to take a shower. Let me brush his hair so he's clean.

Looking lovely. Yeah. Fresh wash still dry. Yes. Well done. Yes. Big wonder. I love that as well. Warm from the dryer. Pajamas are, like, one of the most soothing things ever. So, my kiddo, I got up because I. On Thursday, if I had taken his photo, he would have looked a little rough. But I'm like, whatever his photo, just get it done, as long as it looks like him. But Friday, I'm not saying he's gonna be on the COVID of GQ magazine, but I like the photo. I mean, he was in a much better condition.

He looked much better Friday morning. And then it was, okay, come downstairs. Mom needs to take a picture. And I got out the good lights, got him into my studio, did all of the things right. Yeah. And especially if it's lights that he can't control. So taking him out to the strangers, Lights, no bueno. But he came downstairs, you know, I got him to stand. I'm like, go stand there. And he's like, no. And gave me a hard time. But at least we got to keep it light and we got to keep it fun. And I knew if he decided that he wasn't gonna hold still long enough for me to take the photo, I try again later.

We had the whole day to put this around and figure out how to do it. You know what? He did it. And I got the photo. I'm gonna be able to print it out. Get that? And it's one less thing I have to worry about when we get to the passport office, because I'm hoping that I just have to have him in there long enough for them to prove he's a real human being and everything else, and then just dip, you know, kind of thing. Just dip. So I'll tell you about that eventually, once we get closer to that. But I think it's also reminding yourself that you're allowed to do that.

You're allowed to figure out what is the least stressful thing for you and the people that you care for, the people that you parent, the people in your life and even yourself. Like, what's the least stressful way to do this? There may be a standard way to do it, but there's nothing that says that you have to do that. If there is another option, you are allowed and able to take advantage of the things that give you the most peace and that care for you in the way that is possible. Because I could have sat there and said, no.

I'm supposed to do it this way, you go down and you do this, and maybe it'll be great, Maybe he'll think it's a fun adventure when that's just tricking myself into making it more complicated for me. Why am I gonna do that? Other than there's a process that you think you have to fall into. And we do that all the we go, here's the way it's supposed to work. And then you're like, but it doesn't work for you. So let's not do it that way. Let's figure out the way that it can work for you within the framework that you need to work within.

But there might be something that can make it easier for you where you don't have to set. Put yourself through the portions of things that make it arduous or torturous or potentially even dangerous. So let just figure out how to release all of that. So, as I said, this was a week that was good on paper. And I'm glad that even though it was an anxious one, it turned out. And today is a good example. You know, I could have sat there and said, oh, technology is a beast. I give up. But instead I'm like, oh, here's the way it looks.

And then I talked to Ms. Shannon and said, here's what we'll do. And I'm like, oh, maybe it's my ph. Let's go see if it works on Dominic's iPad. I just was a little worried that it wouldn't work on his iPad because it's kind of old, because I. It's not that he doesn't have technology, it's just that this is his secondary advice. He is blessed. He is blessed. He mostly lives on his phone. This is. We do other stuff on here. So for now on, for the time being, it is the. The device that I will connect with you, my wonderful community on until we figure out something else.

And I'm glad that it worked out. I appreciate everybody that pops in here. Speak Wonder. Thank you for everything that you share. Junk Food Junkie. Thank you for all of your articles. Shannon, thank you for popping in because I know that you don't live stream as much as possible, but is always wonderful as much as you used to. But I am always happy to see your perspective on things. And we always want to continue to know what it is that we can do to continue to share the information that you need in the way that you need it and give a variety of different perspectives, because we know that that's part of the journey as well is that we are all completely different onions.

And you go layer by layer. And sometimes you need to have an onion to tell you something different. So today you got the information from a purple onion, maybe la. Later you'll need a yellow onion or white onion to tell you what it is. Or who knows, maybe a scallion. Maybe a scallion. They got layers too. But we will have a variety of different ways to provide that information to you on the road. What I continue to tell everybody to do is please be safe, Please think about a couple of things you can do for yourself.

Over the week. I started writing down my questions just, you know, because I get talking and forget. So I do have something that I think might be some good things for us to think on throughout the week. So here's the first one. What's something you finally did even though you were nervous about doing it? So what's something you finally did even though you were nervous about doing that? That's my particular adventure right now with getting his passport. So I'm finally getting this done. It's causing me a lot, a lot of nervous energy.

But now that that is out and spoken, I have the ability to start working towards how can I put positive energy behind it so we have the most likely positive outcome possible. And then the next thing I encourage you to do is think about this as well. What are you asking yourself to pay closer attention to right now? So what are you asking yourself to pay closer attention to right now? For me, I'm asking myself to pay closer attention to what is it that actually works for you and works for your son versus what the establishment of the society has told you that you have to do.

I think right now that's something that is very important to me is finding what is actually going to work for us so I can go back to those moments of peace and gentle care and for us to have a good time. And I had one of those moments just last night. You know how every once in a while something pops into your mind? And I was in my room and he's in his room and I heard him snoring a little bit because he snores a little bit. And I just had this moment of gratitude and this moment of, I'm really lucky.

I have a good kid. And I do. I have a really good kid. And to be able to sit in that moment and go, you need to pay. Pay closer attention to those moments sometimes. And so that gave me peace and I slept well thinking on how good my kiddo is. And how fortunate I am to have him in my life. So give yourself that moment as well. And then I'm going to go move some snow. I'm going to hope that when I hit stop on this today, it'll allow me to post it for anyone who wasn't able to join us. I do plan to be with you in some variety on some device.

We will figure it out. This Thursday at 2pm Central, I will be back here again for another edition of Comedy through the Chaos. In the meantime, ping me if there's anything that comes up. I'll make sure I drop some videos throughout the week. You're always welcome to comment on those as well and let us know what we can do to continue to support you and what other messages we can share and what it is that you need right now. And finally, as I always say, I hope that the day treats you well and if it doesn't, shame on it.

Not shame on you. We appreciate all of you and I'll see you back here soon.