What’s In Your Toolbox?

Did we shut that door? No. Are we on? We're on. Yes, we are on. It's gonna. We're gonna take a few minutes to make sure it alerts the people it needs to alert. Happy Tuesday, everyone. It's Tuesday, the January 24. The dunks are excited as well. Fur babies are welcome. Yeah. We are going live. It is Tuesday at noon, which means we. Hey, Risa. Hey, Miss Risa. Vertical. Vertical. Jill and Mary, we are here. What's in your toolbox? Toolbox. It's toolbox Tuesday. So last week we kicked it off with a conversation about your self awareness.

We believe that your self awareness is truly the foundation of how you live your life and how you live your life to the most. For it to be the most fruitful, for you to know the things that are stopping you, the things that are in your way. Because a lot of the time. I don't know if anyone else can relate to this. I'm usually the one that's in my own way. But it's very easy to blame circumstances and other individuals for what problems I've actually got going on that I created myself. So self awareness is the foundation for your toolbox.

It really should be the bottom of the toolbox, not even necessarily a tool, because it's what every other tool in your toolbox sits upon. Right. We like to say that when you are self aware, you get to remove the blinders away from your eyes so you can look around and just take notice of what's happening around you. What's up, Chris? Hey, Chris. Hey. Hey. It's cold here today. We're in sunny phoenix wearing a jacket. The sun is shining. It's beautiful outside, but it is cold. I woke up to it being 32 degrees this morning, which, you know, we expect this time of year, but I know it doesn't hold a candle to Minnesota.

So thanks for. Thanks for keeping the real cold from us. We appreciate it. Totally. Let's get into what we want to talk about today. Let's talk about outside of self awareness being the foundation of what we think is the most important to practice. How you practice that is through what we use, what we use daily. And it's our values. It's our personal values. Our values truly are the filter in which we put every decision through. And it's cliche. It's an old saying. It should be one of those motivational posters.

If you don't know what you're standing for, you will fall for anything. So we had a huge conversation about values with about 200 mothers and daughters this past Sunday, and it was really cool just to see the light bulb moments going off in the crowd of, wow. Like, just like, self awareness. We've all heard of the word values. We all have a general concept of what having values means. And maybe your family has values. Maybe they have traditions and things that they carry on, but maybe you haven't thought as far as establishing values for yourself.

And that's really where we want to take this conversation today. And if you are, hang in with us right now, if you're on it, if you're watching us live, we would love to even just see if you can drop a value that matters most to you in the chat. So whether for us, one of our personal values, personal values and professional values is fun. We have to have fun in our day. And how we measure that is by laughter. If we can laugh until we cry, we're like, man, that we can chalk that up as a successful day.

So we'd love to hear what's one of your values? Drop them in the chat. Let us know. But let's talk about why values are so important. Mary honestly said it beautifully. If you don't stand for something, your values help you stand for something. You honestly conform or fall to anything. So our values guide us. They are literally why we act and what we act on. They are a filter for our choice. Values help us navigate moment to moment decisions and allow us to set more meaningful goals. So just as an example, if you value being well rested, if health, if part of your health journey is getting enough sleep, and one of your friends comes to you on a Wednesday night and says, hey, do you want to have dinner?

And you're like, that sounds like a great idea. And they're like, cool. m. At this pizza joint. m.. Absolutely. That is, you don't even have to think about that choice because you know that you hold sleep in a very high regard. It's a, a value of yours to show up well rested. Now, are there certain circumstances in which you will put your values aside to have fun? Maybe it's a Friday night and that same question comes along. Then you get to decide where and when you play with your values. But values allow you to establish boundaries in your life, that you then get to decide where they go and where you, where they ebb and where they flow.

It helps you make choices and decisions. Brennan, you said flagship. No, he said sparkle. Oh, he said sparkle. But I know flagship for you. Is an important word. It's a driver for a lot for you to make decisions on. We had that conversation when you were in town this week. So, values. We like to say that your values can ebb and flow, and they are a part of your journey. So it doesn't mean that your values are concrete. It can. Depending on the season that you're in, they can. They can shift, they can adjust.

They can change. And that's okay because you're changing. So if you're like, I don't even know what my values are. And for parents watching this, this is really important to establish your own values that you're raising your family on. And it doesn't mean the way that you were raised and the values that you were raised upon or in needs to be the way that you parent or raise your family. Under those values, you get to decide what matters to you and how you want to have those filters be your focus so that you can make decisions and that you can say yes to things and no to things that don't align with those values well.

And what you're doing is giving a beautiful example of your kids on how to establish their own values. Because what we've noticed in working with people over a handful of years as humans, it's very easy to gravitate towards what we are not good at. Right? I am shy. I am this. I am that. It's very easy to point out what we perceive to be negative qualities about our personality. But when we ask a group of people to tell us what they're good at, we get a lot of. A lot more silence, which brings our absolute heart, because that was inside.

It's like, I'm good at this, but I'm scared to say it because of judgment or fear of what other people might say about me or to me, it becomes a lot more difficult to say those positive things about ourself. And the reason I bring up what we think about ourselves is those things, those qualities that we feel like we're good at, those characteristics in which we really feel, like, shine. Those help us establish our boundaries. Those are nudges. Those are breadcrumbs to pick up on certain things. So if I want to explore something or a subject matter really lights me up, I want to lean into that.

I want to really be able to express it fully in order to really flesh out what's important to me and what's not. So here's, we're gonna. We're gonna leave you with three questions to ponder while you're exploring and discovering what your values are. So number one, the first thing around this conversation of values is choose three to five. That's it. Three to five values that you live by, that those values guide you in your day to day life. And you can certainly have more than that, but we risk kind of muddying the water.

You're like, I love this. In this send this right, squirrel, squirrel, everything. You're glittery, shiny. You're spreading yourself really thin. When you start to focus on so many things that three to five really starts to build the foundation of which we're standing on. And that's really what we want you to pick out for yourself. So in the comments we're seeing, Katie, you said being real and authentic, beautiful, beautiful words. You can see somebody or probably smell somebody out, fake within ten minutes of meeting them.

And that is such a beautiful gift because of what you value, Risa, communication, grit. Yes. Positivity. Absolutely. You value positivity. Who fooled us? And if you're still challenged by finding the words, there's a ton of resources online. If you go to Brene Brown, her website has a wonderful resource list of values that you can read and really figure out. Man, that resonates with me. That feels good. But also, this question can help you discover your values. It's what three words would you like people to describe you as?

What three words would you like people to describe you as? Not what they already describe you as, not who you are now. Because right now you might be beating yourself up. You might be thinking, I'm not enough, I'm not pretty enough, I'm not smart enough, whatever that is, whatever that, that inner critic, that negative self talk is, what do you want to be known as? And you get to establish that, especially with this next question. How will people know this about me? So if I want people to know that I am energetic, obviously a lot of you can already tell that.

But if I really want people to know that I can't show up in a room with my arms crossed and my head down, right, I need to be the light. I need to walk in with my arms open, my head held high, scanning the room as if I own it, right, you have to embody these certain qualities if you want people to know that about you. But the cool thing about that second question, what three words would you like people to use to describe you? You establish that you tell the world how you're going to show up. You don't let the world tell you, and we forget that we have.

Jill said this earlier. You get to take your blinders off. So many of us are walking around with our blinders on and our head down. Just getting through the day. Brendon, you actually posted a really beautiful video about this last night on your stories. If anybody's curious, I would totally go watch it about just how you know my name is Mary, but that's not who I am. That's the name my parents gave me, right? I'm so much more than that. I am dynamic. I'm spiritual. I have a great relationship with God.

There's so much more about me that doesn't fall into my name. But people forget that because we're so heads down to do list. To do list. To do list. To do list. What three words would you like people to use to describe you? And how will people know this about you? So if you can't pick those three to five values, this is a really great follow up question in order to really establish who you are or who you would like to be. So there's the distance between where you are now and where you would like to be.

How do you fill that gap? Okay, that's your homework. We cannot wait to come back next week to hear how it went for you. What values did you land on or what did you struggle with? Maybe this is the first time that you're like, man, I actually forgot that I get to decide how I show up in the world versus the world, telling me how to show up in whatever area of your life that you're struggling in. So thank you for hanging with us. We are so pumped about what tool you have in your toolbox that you get to draw from this week.

And we will see you back next week, same time, same place, for another toolbox talk. We hope you have a fantastic Tuesday. We'll talk to you all soon. Bye bye. Oh, we forgot about the countdown. It says 5432.